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Discovering your partner cheated on you, betrayed your trust and shattered your relationship is an awful feeling that no one should ever have to go through. It can lead the other partner feeling unsure who to trust, weakened and it can make them question everything they knew about the relationship beforehand. Yet it is possible to overcome infidelity and rebuild trust in the relationship so it can survive. Therefore, in this social psychology podcast episode, we’re going to look at how to overcome infidelity and rebuild trust so the relationship can survive and thrive. If you enjoy learning about relationships, social psychology and infidelity then this is a great episode for you. Today’s psychology podcast episode is sponsored by Psychology of Relationships: The Social Psychology of Romantic Relationships, Friendships and More.  Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Note: like all podcast episodes, nothing on the podcast is ever any sort of official relationship, medical or any other form of advice. Why Am I Talking About Infidelity On A Psychology Podcast? I’m talking about this on The Psychology World Podcast, a podcast mainly dedicated to aspiring and qualified psychologists for three main reasons. Firstly, infidelity is a behaviour and psychology covers all of human behaviour so it makes sense for us to look at it. Secondly, infidelity can happen to anyone even psychology students and professionals. That’s why we need to look at it in case any of you listeners or readers need this information in the future. As this podcast episode could help you heal, thrive and rebuild trust quicker compared to if you didn’t have this information. Finally, if you’re an aspiring or qualified clinical psychologist or another mental health professional, then there is a chance you will come across infidelity in your clinical work. Therefore, this podcast episode might be a useful resource for you to think about in a therapy session so you can help your clients better. Especially if you haven’t encountered infidelity before. How To Overcome Infidelity? No one should ever deny that the healing process after infidelity is challenging, but the pain can be overcome and trust can be rebuilt using some knowledge. You Need To Validate And Acknowledge Your Feelings After Infidelity Firstly, when it comes to infidelity you need to validate and acknowledge your feelings, because you need to accept them and it is okay to feel what you’re feeling. You should always try to allow yourself to feel the full range of emotions that you’re experiencing like betrayal, sadness, anger, confusion amongst others. Due to it is normal to have these sort of reactions to infidelity because it is a confusing time and infidelity should never happen. This is why it might be an idea to get support from a trusted friend or family member who can provide a safe space for you to express your emotions without judgment. This is something I’ve learnt a lot about recently since it’s been 8 weeks since my sexual assault, and I tried for so, so long not to allow myself to feel certain ways. I tried to force away the confusion, the anger, the hate and the more assault-related emotions that infidelity doesn’t bring up. Yet it did no good for me, it affected my mental health badly, it didn’t help me heal and it only prolonged my struggles. My point is you need to allow yourself to feel your emotions otherwise you will do real damage to yourself and your mental health in the long term. You cannot pretend everything is fine after infidelity. You Need To Allow Yourself To Grieve I know we’re only on the second point but I’m realising that there is a lot of overlap between overcoming infidelity and a lot of other mental health difficulties and negative experiences. So this is something we should all be trying to focus on and learn from, especially as infidelity can happen to anyone. As a result, infidelity is a loss and you need to allow yourself to grieve the loss of trust, the lost future and effectively the shattered dreams that you and your partner had together. Also, you need to allow yourself to grieve for the relationship itself because even if you work things out, it has still changed and you will need to heal and go through the ups and downs too. Overall, you need to give yourself time to heal at your own pace without suppressing your emotions nor trying to rush this stuff. Personally, it is that rushing of healing that in my experience is the most damaging and it causes a lot more distress. I have tried to rush my healing from the trauma of my assault, I have tried to be okay and perfect and like nothing has happened so I can live a perfectly normal life again. Yet that simply isn’t possible and that’s okay, because I need to heal at my own pace. After infidelity You Should Self-Reflect Considering that infidelity is all about loss, it might be a good idea to engage in some kind of self-reflection so you can reflect on the relationship itself and any factors that contributed to the infidelity. This is and will be about blaming yourself or your partner for what happened but self-reflection can be helpful for identifying any vulnerabilities or personal patterns that might have existed within the relationship. Overall, if you’re able to recognise these patterns and continue self-reflection then this can be useful for personal growth and developing healthier relationships in the future. You Need To Take Time For Self-Care I am rubbish at self-care and doing all the different things that you’re meant to do as part of that. However, you need to engage in self-care and look after yourself because you’re likely to be going through a hurricane of different emotions so you need to look after yourself too. You could focus on activities like exercise, hobbies, spending time in nature or anything else that you enjoy.  In addition, you should make sure your body is nourished with healthy food and have a good sleep pattern as well as consider seeking professional help to help you work through your emotions. Personally, as part of Self-care, I’m making sure that I’m being kind to myself when things pop up, I’m seeing friends a lot and I’m doing things that make me happy. Like writing, podcasting and other psychology-related topics. You Need To Establish Boundaries When it comes to trying to rebuild trust, a key part of this is setting clear boundaries for your relationship and yourself. You could set boundaries in terms of guidelines on communication, you could talk about the need for you both to go to couples therapy or have boundaries about the amount of transparency needed going forward. Boundaries are critical to overcoming infidelity in because they help you create a sense of safety as well as security for yourself as you go through the healing process. Whilst I can’t add too much to this section because I’ve never been in a relationship, let alone experienced infidelity, but I know I glad to have a lot of boundaries in the future with any boyfriends or partners. I will have to have boundaries no matter what and my boyfriend will have to understand that we cannot do certain things until I’m ready because of my assault. If they can’t respect that then I’m going to have to kick them to the curb. At the end of the day, boundaries are about respect and if your partner cannot respect you especially after they’ve committed infidelity then they don’t deserve you. I think it’s as simple as that. Have Support and Communicate With Trusted Others I would never ever want you to go through infidelity alone because this will make your mental health suffer, it will cause you a lot of distress and you cannot keep something as horrible as infidelity locked away inside you. Therefore, you need to have and reach out to your social support network of your family and friends, or a mental health professional if you need it. If you share your emotions, your thoughts and your pain with someone you trust then this can help you to lessen the burden of infidelity. This is even more important if you and your partner decide to stay together, because you’re going to have to have good, effective and open communication. You’re going to need to talk about how they hurt you, your boundaries and your expectations of them going forward. The healing process can be seriously helped by developing clear and respectful communication so you can both understand each other. Whilst we can understand that effective communication is important for life in general, I want to stress here that respectful communication is critical in all relationships. For example after what happened to me happened, I had two very clear experiences of communication. I tried to communicate what happened to my social environment (a polite way of saying it without naming names) and I was shut down, I wasn’t listened to and I did not feel supported whatsoever. This only negatively impacted my mental health, I hated it and my distress was increased dramatically because of it. Whereas when I spoke to my friends including my best friend, they listened to me, supported me and made me feel valued. That was critical at the time and it’s even more important now moving forward in the healing process. Give Yourself Time To Rebuild Trust Regardless of what you’ve been through, you need to give yourself time to heal and rebuild trust in people. It’s taken me way too long to understand that and I partly wish I had understood how long things take sooner, because I probably would have been further along in my healing if I had expected this time factor sooner. When it comes to infidelity, you need to realise that rebuilding trust is a slow process that takes patience, time and consistency. You are not going to forgive your partner overnight because that isn’t how forgiveness works in this case, so you need to give yourself the time and space to heal and rebuild trust at your own pace. Moreover, if you’re still with your partner then watch their partners over time and look for consistent efforts to rebuild your trust. For trust to be rebuilt, you both need to be committed to communicating openly, addressing any underlying issues in the relationship and being transparent with each other. That is the only way your relationship can improve. Social Psychology Conclusion If you’re someone who’s experienced this, when it comes to overcoming infidelity, the healing process will be challenging because of the emotions, your confusion and the lack of trust you feel. Yet if you have patience, open communication and do self-care then it is very possible that you can overcome this infidelity and you can rebuild your trust for future relationships. Also, your healing journey will be unique and there isn’t a time limit, so please, just go at your own pace as annoying as that might be. You need to heal at your own pace, and overcome the hardship of infidelity. If you’re a listener or reader who hasn’t experienced infidelity then I hope that doesn’t change and I hope I never experience infidelity in the future. Yet this is still useful to know about in case this does happen to us, our friends or our family. If this does happen then I hope this podcast episode might be a useful resource for all of you, and if you encounter infidelity in your clinical work then I hope you now know that your client can rebuild their life, their trust and they can go on to have great relationships in the future. Something that probably seems flat out impossible in the moment and aftermath of the infidelity, but it is so possible. It really is. So never ever give up on relationships because they really can be amazing especially after experiencing something as awful as infidelity.   I really hope you enjoyed today’s clinical psychology podcast episode. If you want to learn more, please check out: FREE 8 PSYCHOLOGY BOOK BOXSET Psychology of Relationships: The Social Psychology of Romantic Relationships, Friendships and More.  Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Patreon for exclusive access and rewards Have a great day. Social Psychology References and Further Reading Altınok, A., & Kılıç, N. (2020). Exploring the associations between narcissism, intentions towards infidelity, and relationship satisfaction: Attachment styles as a moderator. Plos one, 15(11), e0242277. Anwar, S., Riaz, M. N., & Ahmed, F. (2022). Relationship between Attitude towards Infidelity, Difficulty in Emotion Regulation and Mental Health Issues among Married Individuals. Pakistan Languages and Humanities Review, 6(2), 536-548. Blow, A. J., & Hartnett, K. (2005). Infidelity in committed relationships I: A methodological review. Journal of marital and family therapy, 31(2), 183-216. Fincham, F. D., & May, R. W. (2017). Infidelity in romantic relationships. Current opinion in psychology, 13, 70-74. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-angry-therapist/202306/healing-wounds-how-to-overcome-infidelity-and-rebuild-trust Nemeth, J. M., Bonomi, A. E., Lee, M. A., & Ludwin, J. M. (2012). Sexual infidelity as trigger for intimate partner violence. Journal of Women's Health, 21(9), 942-949. Raftar Aliabadi, M. R., & Shareh, H. (2022). Mindfulness-based schema therapy and forgiveness therapy among women affected by infidelity: A randomized clinical trial. Psychotherapy Research, 32(1), 91-103. Roos, L. G., O'Connor, V., Canevello, A., & Bennett, J. M. (2019). Post‐traumatic stress and psychological health following infidelity in unmarried young adults. Stress and health, 35(4), 468-479. Shrout, M. R., & Weigel, D. J. (2018). Infidelity’s aftermath: Appraisals, mental health, and health-compromising behaviors following a partner’s infidelity. Journal of social and personal relationships, 35(8), 1067-1091. Shrout, M. R., & Weigel, D. J. (2020). Coping with infidelity: The moderating role of self-esteem. Personality and individual differences, 154, 109631. Warach, B., & Josephs, L. (2021). The aftershocks of infidelity: a review of infidelity-based attachment trauma. Sexual and Relationship Therapy, 36(1), 68-90. Weigel, D. J., & Shrout, M. R. (2021). Suspicious minds: The psychological, physical and behavioral consequences of suspecting a partner’s infidelity. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 38(3), 865-887. I truly hope that you’ve enjoyed this blog post and if you feel like supporting the blog on an ongoing basis and get lots of rewards, then please head to my Patreon  page. However, if want to show one-time support and appreciation, the place to do that is PayPal. If you do that, please include your email address in the notes section, so I can say thank you. Which I am going to say right now. Thank you! Click  https://www.buymeacoffee.com/connorwhiteley  for a one-time bit of support.

As aspiring and qualified psychologists, our work mainly focuses on helping people with mental health difficulties. For example, how their depression, social anxiety or trauma responses negatively impact their lives and cause them significant levels of psychological distress. Then we use our psychological knowledge to create interventions to help them. However, less often, we’re taught to think about how physical health and chronic illness can impact our clients in their daily functioning, their quality of life and their mental health. That’s right. Your physical health and chronic illness can directly impact your mental health. Therefore, in this clinical psychology mixed with health psychology podcast episode, you’ll learn more about chronic illness. By the end, you’ll understand what is chronic illness, how chronic illness impacts people and how does chronic illness impact mental health. If you enjoy learning about health psychology, life as a clinical psychologist and more then this is a great episode for you. Today’s psychology podcast episode has been sponsored by Working With Children and Young People: A Guide To Clinical Psychology, Mental Health and Psychotherapy . Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Note: I do apologise in advance if anything in this podcast episode is worded clumsy. I am privileged that I do not have a chronic illness so I do not have lived experience of these conditions. Everything in this episode is based on what I have read and witnessed and heard from friends and my partner. What Is Chronic Illness? Chronic illness is when a person has a condition that lasts for at least a year and it requires ongoing medical care or the condition consistently limits what a person can do on a daily basis. For example, chronic illnesses can include asthma, lung disease, cancer, heart disease, diabetes, stroke, chronic fatigue syndrome amongst others. I’ve known friends with chronic fatigue to be so exhausted and tired that all they can do is lie in bed all day, so this is an example of how a chronic condition can limit your daily activities. In addition, tens of millions of adults in the United States live with a chronic illness and a lot of them actually have at least two chronic illnesses. And having a chronic illness typically requires you to undergo a lot of lifestyle changes that can be challenging and stressful. For example, with a chronic illness, you have to manage new diets, new exercise regimens, a demanding checkup schedule, medication and limits on your social life, your work and your travel. All of these challenges and stressors can lead to anxiety, anger and sometimes depression. And that’s why I wanted to talk about chronic illness this week. From time to time in my clinical psychology lectures, I’ve heard about clinical psychologists working in medical settings to help people with chronic conditions, like chronic pain. I’ve always thought that this was fascinating and interesting but because I’m really busy, I’ve never thought about it that much. Mainly, this is due to my privilege that I do not have a chronic health condition so I don’t need to look into this area of psychology. Until last week. Last week, I was hanging out with my partner at the Dungeons and Dragons game that our friend runs and there are normally a lot of us there. Afterwards, a few of us go out for dinner, me and my partner spend the entire time talking and we basically blank everyone else and then we hang out afterwards. Normally, by talking outside their accommodation for 30-minutes at least. Yet last week, dinner had finished early and we didn’t play board games like we normally do with our friendship group, so me and my partner were going to hang out at mine. Until my partner’s chronic pain and other chronic health conditions kicked in and they expereinced loss of interest and pleasure and their mental health just dropped. We still spoke for 30-minutes outside their accommodation until their joint pain made it unbearable. Just seeing and hearing about how their chronic illness impacted their mental health made me sad, it affected me and it made me really curious about this area of psychology. Therefore, before I can ever hope to understand how clinical psychology can be used to help those with chronic conditions, I actually need to understand what chronic illness is first of all. That’s what the rest of this episode focuses on. Clinical Psychologists Help People Cope with Chronic Illness Whilst there are a lot of different ways how clinical psychologists work with those with chronic illness, one way is coping with their new diagnosis. Since once people receive a diagnosis of their chronic illness, they often experience a lot of grief. They grieve for a life lost and a future that will never go as they had planned. For example, if you’re diagnosed with chronic fatigue syndrome then your dreams of being a runner, a sports player or if your dream career involved something with a lot of physical activity like being a firefighter. That all seems impossible now, and maybe it is, maybe it isn’t. Whatever the case, a diagnosis of chronic illness involves a lot of grieving. In addition, people with chronic illness have to go through a lot of mood changes, even in the day to day, because there will be times when they’re fine and happy. Then their chronic illness might impact them, might stop them doing something and this might make them anxious, angry or depressed. This is because our mood can be very dependent on our options and your physical health. One of the reasons why my partner’s mood fluctuates slightly at the moment is because they don’t have any treatment options, they don’t know exactly what they have and their physical health is still really bad. This lack of physical health and treatment option has a negative impact on their mood. Clinical psychologists are useful here because research shows that when clients directly tackle their diagnosis instead of avoiding it, and they seek help instead of retreating from the diagnosis. They experience better life satisfaction and undergo a healthier adjustment. This is why it’s important to encourage clients with chronic illness to become more empowered by asking their doctors questions about their diagnosis, treatment and what this means for them. Psychologists can help clients by supporting them whilst they process their grief and undergo this adjustment period. Similar to what psychologists do in mental health interventions, they can help clients with chronic illness by reminding them to focus on what brings them joy and other aspects of behavioural activation. This can be as simple as committing to one small act of joy each day. Since clients can reduce their outside commitments and obligations to focus on things that are more important to them personally, like spending time with their children or partner. This can help protect them against the stress of their diagnosis. Ultimately, when it comes to coping with chronic illness (and this is definitely where clinical psychologists can be extremely useful) it’s critical that clients remain positive despite their chronic illness. Since research shows people with a cancer diagnosis who remained resilient and positive where able to use professional counselling and social support to manage their chronic illness for years and decades. This meant the clients were able to avoid rumination, accept their mortality and take an active role in their physical health and treatment. All despite their cancer diagnosis. This positivity is the key to everything when dealing with a chronic illness, and some clients believe that their diagnosis changed them for the better. At the time of writing, I’m currently reading I Haven’t Been Entirely Honest With You By Miranda Hart and it’s a book about her diagnosis and healing from Lyme disease. It’s a chronic health condition so she hasn’t been cured but her outlook, her behavioural patterns and her cognitive processes are at the core of the book. She writes about how her stress-pot, her constant people-pleasing and wanting to be extremely productive because that’s she got her self-worth all contributed to her physical health getting worse to the point where it almost killed her. She learnt so much about herself all because of her Lyme disease. I highly recommend that you read the book if you want to have a deeper understanding of how mental health and what we think and feel and how we behave impacts our physical health. Another aspect of this is people with chronic illness need to try and commit to staying positive even if they find their mood decreasing because of their chronic illness. Since someone can become sick of being sick. This is where psychologists can be useful because psychologists could help support a client whilst they support the client in acknowledging how they feel and allow themselves to be upset, reach out to supportive others and challenge themselves to find positive aspects of their lives to help them regain a sense of control. Even though, I don’t have a chronic illness, this is why I found my rape and anorexia counselling so valuable. They both helped me to understand to process my feelings, know that they were valid and find the positive aspects in my life so I could feel in control again. A final aspect of coping with chronic illness that I want to mention is how people with chronic illness manage fatigue. Since fatigue is a symptom of many chronic conditions and this represents a massive challenge for people who face it. When this happens, a person with chronic illness (and perhaps a psychologist could support them realising this) should try to move on from their ideals of an ideal day towards a more realistic one. They can listen to their body’s cues, as well as become more flexible in their relationship with their body so they don’t beat themselves up over their fatigue and how it impacts their daily life. Then when they don’t have fatigue or when their fatigue impacts their life slightly less, then they can be able to embrace the moments that they can. For example, if you wanted to get a ton of work done today and you wanted to go out in the evening to see your friends before hanging out with your partner at night. Yet your fatigue makes that ideal day impossible. It would be about focusing on what you can do, being kind and self-compassionate and managing your health one day at a time, so when you feel better and less fatigued, you can embrace the joyful moments that you want to. How Does Chronic Illness Impact Mental Health? I wanted there to be a section in this psychology podcast episode that explicitly explained how chronic illness impacts mental health. Therefore, chronic illness has a profound emotional and psychological impact on people because they can lead to a range of intense emotions, like grief, sadness, anxiety and frustration. Mainly, this comes from the life-alternating nature of a diagnosis and the diagnosis can make people feel hopeless about their lives as they no longer have a sense of control. Another side effect is that these feelings of hopelessness can exacerbate feelings of depression within people with chronic illness. Psychologists can help because they can support clients through the grieving process and help them readjust to their new diagnosis. Another way how chronic illness impacts mental health is through an increased risk of depression. Since research shows people with chronic illness are at a higher risk of developing depression with people with diabetes being 2 to 3 times more likely to experience depression compared to people without diabetes. As you can imagine psychologists can help clients deal with their feelings of depression. This is even more important when we learn that depression can complicate the management of chronic illnesses and typically leads to worse health outcomes and even an increased mortality rate. The references for all these facts are available at the bottom of the blog post. A final way how chronic illness can impact mental health is through coping strategies and treatment which touches on a lot of the points I mentioned in the section above. This is why psychologists are needed so they can ensure a holistic treatment plan is developed and stuck to that addresses the client’s physical and psychological needs. Psychologists Can Help People Facing a Future of Illness Unless you’ve ever met or you have a chronic illness, like me, then you might never have thought about what the diagnosis of a chronic illness can mean to someone. Of course, there are benefits like it means they can hopefully get access to treatment options that will help them with their symptoms. However, a diagnosis also means a confirmation of everything they’ve feared. It means they actually have a chronic illness that is with them for the rest of their lives so they’re going to face an uncertain future where their illness is always with them. And they need to learn how to live and deal with that. As a result, finding support is critical after a diagnosis of chronic illness and thankfully, there are support for groups for many health conditions across the country or there are online support groups too. Yet whilst these support groups are critical because you get to meet and talk with other people with the same condition as you, it is support from friends and family members that will be important to help the person cope with their chronic illness. Sharing News Of A Chronic Illness Diagnosis One difficulty with a new chronic illness diagnosis is that it can be very scary to share the news with friends and family members. This is a deeply personal piece of information to share and they’re likely to be nervous, anxious and concerned about how other people will react because it will fundamentally change how others see them. For example, whilst I don’t have a chronic illness, there are some parrels with telling others that you’re a rape survivor. To put this in the dating context, I wasn’t sleeping, I felt sick and I was scared that my partner was going to leave me if I told them that I was raped. Thankfully, they didn’t but it was a massive stressor that I didn’t need on top of everything else in my life at the time. Equally, people with chronic illness don’t want their friends and family members to judge them for their chronic illness. Personally, whilst I know being raped and having chronic illness is not the same thing, but there will be times when your health means you cannot do things, you cannot go outside and you have to cancel plans with friends. It is even more hurtful when your friends and family members (thankfully this is only the minority) do judge you and make comments. I think this is similar to people with invisible chronic conditions because there will always be some silly people who do believe “you look fine, so you must be fine”. Do not listen to those people. In reality, what I have found and what a lot of people with chronic illness have found too is that your friends and family members will be a lot more supportive than you ever thought possible. They will be able and willing to offer you help, but it’s important that you establish clear boundaries with them too so your friends and family members know what aspects of your chronic illness you are not comfortable talking about. In addition, some people with chronic health conditions might feel fine most of the time but then they might have episodes of illness or fatigue. This means they might need to put breaks on plans or cancel things because they need to look after themselves. This is why it’s important to be open and honest with friends and loved ones according to experts. It’s better to be open about your needs for hands-on and emotional support so you know you don’t need to deal with your illness alone. It’s okay to ask for help with shopping, cooking, rides to appointments, childcare and so. Psychologists are very useful at this point in the chronic illness process. Clinical psychologists can work with carers, clients and their partners to come to terms with the chronic illness diagnosis. Psychologists can help the client come to terms with the diagnosis, come up with a plan about how to tell others and how to manage their life alongside their illness. What’s The Main Challenge of Living With A Chronic Illness For Decades? This is even more important when we learn that the primary challenge of living with a chronic illness for decades to come is the uncertainty that it causes. The person with the chronic illness might never know when their symptoms will flare up, what treatments will work and what job or career they are actually going to be able to do. This all takes an emotional toll on the person and leads to “illness uncertainty”. Illness Uncertainty is the inability for a person to determine the meaning of illness-related events and this makes a person experience unpredictability, ambiguity, deficient information and complexity. From what I have seen from one of my friend’s partners, she can be enjoying herself, talking and have a perfectly normal day then her chronic health flares up and she cannot function, she has to lay down for hours and rest. Sometimes she can work out what caused it but there are times when she can’t. It is very life-limiting when this happens and she sometimes made comments where she would avoid going out because she couldn’t guarantee she wouldn’t have a flare up. How Chronic Illness Can Lead To Changes In Friendships? Another challenge of chronic illness is they can often find that their relationships with their close others change, and sometimes their friends “go missing” so their friends effectively ditch them. And it’s common for people with chronic illnesses to get angry, feeling let down by someone and they blame themselves for friendships ending or changing because of their chronic illness. Yet when this happens, experts suggest it’s more adaptive and healthier to recognise that relationships always change and this rarely has anything to do with health. Changes in relationships are just a normal part of life. And this is why it’s important to engage in self-compassion when relationships change so clients aren’t generating stories about why a friend has stopped contacting or talking to them that might not reflect the reality of what happened. Psychologists can be very useful here in helping the client to navigate these social changes and learn how to express self-compassion. How Does Chronic Illness Impact Young People? Penultimately, chronic illnesses can pose massive challenges to young people, like my partner and my best friend. Lots of people might believe that because a young person acts and looks “normal” (whatever that means) that it is impossible for them to have a chronic illness. Yet the young people with the chronic illness is likely to fixate and stress about their education (and this is one of the reasons why my best friend has struggled with university for years), how they’re going to find a romantic partner and how they’re going to live a life where they have to watch everyone else do fun, cool things but because of their chronic illness they cannot take part. This is an aspect I remember very well from last August at the time of writing. Everyone else was out, going on holidays and doing cool things with partners and loved ones. My best friend was up in the Midlands with their family, my parents were doing knife-making and so on. Meanwhile, I was stuck at home alone, experiencing trauma reactions, unable to move and I was experiencing a lot of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder symptoms. It felt me feel even worse that I was trapped at home because of my health and everyone else was living an amazing life in my eyes. People with chronic illness experience similar feelings. This is where psychologists can be helpful because they can support a person with chronic illness Can People with Chronic Illness Achieve Post-Traumatic Growth? Finally, post-traumatic growth is one of my favourite psychological concepts because I experienced a lot of this after my rape. Yet people with chronic illness might experience growth in five key areas proposed by Richard Tedeschi and Lawrence Calhoun. These key areas are seeing new possibilities, relating to others, finding personal strength, achieving appreciation of life and experiencing spiritual change. Whilst experiencing growth in these areas are not universal, especially when comes to chronic illness, sometimes these growth areas can be developed through therapy. Clinical Psychology Conclusion After seeing how my partner’s chronic illness impacted their mental health last week, I really wanted to learn more about chronic illness. I know I have long, long way to go before I have ever claim to remotely understand what it is like to have a chronic illness, let alone how it impacts their mental health. I am really glad that I’ve done this episode because we’re all learnt what chronic illness is, what some of the challenges are of living with chronic illness and how psychologists can help those with chronic illness. I truly believe that psychology has a valuable place within physical health because your physical body and health might generate the symptoms. But it is your psychological processes and your perception of your physical health that will impact your mental health and the psychological side of inflammation and psychological experiences of illness. Psychology really is more powerful and helpful than any of us could ever know.     I really hope you enjoyed today’s psychology student life psychology podcast episode. If you want to learn more, please check out: FREE 8 PSYCHOLOGY BOOK BOXSET Working With Children and Young People: A Guide To Clinical Psychology, Mental Health and Psychotherapy . Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Patreon for exclusive access and rewards Have a great day. Clinical Psychology and Health Psychology References and Further Reading Beckmann, J., Huber, M., & Andonian-Dierks, C. S. (2024). Chronic illness and well-being: Promoting quality of life with a broadened concept of recovery. In Fostering Recovery and Well-being in a Healthy Lifestyle (pp. 3-23). Routledge. Hanvey, I., Malovic, A., & Ntontis, E. (2022). Glass children: The lived experiences of siblings of people with a disability or chronic illness. Journal of Community & Applied Social Psychology, 32(5), 936-948. https://patient.info/news-and-features/how-a-chronic-illness-affects-your-mental-health https://publichealth.jhu.edu/2021/the-intersection-of-mental-health-and-chronic-disease https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/chronic-illness-mental-health https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/basics/chronic-illness Koenig, H. G. (2023). Suicidal behaviors in diabetics, mental health of cancer patients following curative treatment, substance use disorder in hospitalized psychiatric patients in Botswana, nutritional factors as predictors and mediators of mental health problems in chronic illness, and more. The International Journal of Psychiatry in Medicine ,  58 (4), 299-301. Skojec, T. A., Davidson, T. M., & Kelechi, T. J. (2025). The relationship between uncertainty in illness and psychological adjustment to chronic illness.  Journal of Health Psychology ,  30 (4), 622-637. I truly hope that you’ve enjoyed this blog post and  if you feel like supporting the blog on an ongoing basis and get lots of rewards, then please head to my Patreon  page. However, if want to show one-time support and appreciation, the place to do that is PayPal. If you do that, please include your email address in the notes section, so I can say thank you. Which I am going to say right now. Thank you! Click  https://www.buymeacoffee.com/connorwhiteley  for a one-time bit of support.

For the past six years that I’ve been running this podcast, I’ve had to sit university psychology exams. Every year, I hear from other students that they are stressed out, concerned and they are nervous about their revision, their exams and the results day itself. Recently, I gave a series of talks at a local college in Canterbury to help 17 and 18 year olds how to cope with exam stress, so I want to share this knowledge with you. By the end of this clinical psychology podcast episode, you’ll understand what is exam stress, how to identify exam stress and how to cope with exam stress during revision, your exam and results day. As well as you’ll learn what to do if your mind goes blank during an exam. If you’re a psychology student worried about exams, then this is a perfect episode for you. Today’s psychology podcast episode has been sponsored by Third Year Survival Guide: A Psychology Student’s Guide To The Final Year of Their Undergraduate Degree.  Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. What Is Exam Stress for Psychology Students? The other week I was talking with a 2nd year psychology student friend of mine and he was talking about the child development exam that no one was looking forward to. He was struggling to learn all the different theories of language development, let alone all the other theories and studies that he needed to learn for this exam. To say that he was stressed was an understatement. It turned out that he wasn’t alone because another 2nd year friend of mine posted on Instagram that it seemed easier to pass away than pass his exams. A bit of morbid exam humour for you. My point is that it is very normal for psychology students to feel stressed during exam time. I know I was extremely stressed during the final year of my undergraduate because I really, really wanted to get a 2:1, but I didn’t know if my academic writing was up to scratch. Thankfully, it was, but it wasn’t a fun time for me. As a result, exam stress is exactly what it says on the tin. It is the psychological distress and feelings of overwhelm that you get from exams. Exam stress can be caused by thinking about the exam itself, the revision and a whole bunch of other factors related to the exam. What Are Signs of Exam Stress and How Stress Might Make You Feel? In addition, when you’re feeling exam stress, you might become more susceptible to illness (like headaches and stomach aches), you might experience mood swings and become more stressed out so you’re irritable and snappy. During my series of talks, I explained how during my GCSEs (the secondary school exams we sit when you’re 16 years old in the UK) I was very snappy with my parents, because I was stressed about my exams. Another sign or symptom of stress is you might engage in nervous habits, like biting your fingernails, and there might be changes in your eating (because stress can suppress your appetite) or sleeping habits. Some of the other ambassadors who were supporting my talk mentioned how their chocolate consumption skyrocketed during exam season because it helped them to relax. A personal story I shared during my talks was that I was put in for the Higher Paper during my French GCSE mocks and I was so stressed about it the night before, I remembered being wrapped up in the exam paper. Then whenever I tried to look at what the questions would be everything went blurry. I didn’t sleep well that night, and I failed the Higher Paper anyway. I actually failed my French GCSE overall, and nowadays I’m doing very well at French on Duolingo. I could easily pass my GCSE now. Another way how stress might make you feel is like you have low energy and you can’t be productive, or you don’t look after yourself and you have little interest in anything. As psychology students, you might recognise that these signs have some things in common with depression and you can feel a little depressed because of exam stress. Here, we aren’t talking about major depression but you might be depressed during exam season. This is why it’s important to practice self-care, do fun things and don’t make your entire life about revision. How To Avoid Exam Stress? The next part of the talk involved me discussing ways to avoid exam stress with the students. Therefore, it’s important to note that exam stress can come from poor exam prep, so it’s important to do a little bit every day and make a revision plan. For my Neuropsychology of Ageing exam, it helped me to make a plan about what topics I was going to revise each day. My plan made me feel more in control and it made the revision feel a lot less overwhelming. Another source of exam stress is a fear of the unknown. This is why it’s important to understand what your exam will be on and when and where it is exactly. I didn’t really experience this with my Neuropsychology of Ageing exam because I knew everything in the lectures were topics we might be tested on, but none of the student presentations or optional readings would be on the exam. However, the day of my exam, I had a lot of exam stress because I couldn’t find where I was meant to sit in the exam hall, and I hadn’t sat an in-person exam in 6 years. I was concerned and stressed about how it all worked, what I was and was not allowed to bring into the exam hall and so on. Make sure you find all this out beforehand. Two final ways to avoid exam stress are try and make sure your diet is stable. This is very important because you don’t want a sugar crash or hunger impacting your exam or revision. As well as make sure to take time out so you can relax, be active and do what you enjoy. If you make your entire life all about revision, the quality of your revision will decrease and you’ll be burnt out by the time you reach your exam. Personally, during the talk itself, me and the other ambassadors talked about this next tip in the revision skills section, but I want to explain it to you. One way to reduce exam stress and increase your sense of control is to revise your way. You might be a visual learner, your best friend might be an audio learner and your other friend might revise best using active recall. Okay, active recall is always best, but revise the way that works best for you. It doesn’t matter how your friends revise. You need to do what works best for you if you want to succeed in your exams. A common tip that I really liked asking my ambassadors was about the music they listen to during revision. Some students need complete and utter silence to revise effectively, other students need background music to be able to focus. One ambassador who I really like prefers to listen to classical music during revision because she fines it relaxing. Whereas another ambassador likes listening to lofi. For me, I tend to listen to “coffee jazz” or some Demonslayer lofi during revision, or if it is a really boring topic that I hate then I put on some more epic and dramatic Demonslayer music because it helps me to focus. Do whatever works best for you. There is no right way. Only the way that works for you. How To Avoid Exam Stress On Exam Day? When it comes to the exam itself, to avoid exam stress, it is best if you avoid large amounts of caffeine and sugar on the day of the exam itself. This will help you to avoid any crashes before or during your exam. Also, make sure you eat a balanced breakfast and lunch so you aren’t hungry during your exam. Some other tips include: ·       Arrive at the exam hall in plenty of time so you can take a breath, find out where you’re sitting and relax before the exam starts. ·       Check you’re in the right place and sitting in the right place. ·       Get comfortable, relax and breathe. ·       Don’t rush- think and plan before you start answering the questions. ·       Read the information carefully and follow all exam instructions ·       Work out a time plan and stick to it ·       Decide on an exam strategy (will you answer easy or high-mark questions first?) In the talk, I explained how focusing on these strategies helped me not to get stressed during my exams. In my Neuropsychology exam, I focused on answering the 20 Multiple Choice questions first of all to get them out the way then I planned to spend twenty minutes on the remaining five short-answer questions where I needed to write in-depth answers to each one. This helped me not get stressed because I had a plan and I was able to stick with it. Other Ways to Avoid Exam Stress During an Exam We’ve all been there in an exam where you’re writing along and then suddenly, your mind goes blank. It is one of the most annoying situations and it can really stress you out because time is still ticking away, thoughts start popping into your head about what if this is what makes you fail and so on. If your mind goes blank during an exam, put your pen down, read what you’ve done so far and then plan your next steps. As well as note down everything that you know about the topic and/ or leave a gap and move onto the next question so you can come back to it later. I’ve found in the past that sometimes coming back to exam questions is very helpful because your answers to other questions remind you about related topics, so you can answer the questions you were stuck on earlier. Another issue you might encounter during an exam is you find yourself running out of time. If you find yourself running out of time then get the main points down and any evidence even if it is just in bullets because you can still get marks for putting something down, and you can always return later if you have time to flesh these points out more. As well as divide the remaining time between the number of answers because it is better to put down the key information for each answer rather than just leaving it blank if you can help it. Finally, for this section, you might be writing along in your exam and find that you’re getting confused. I’ve had a few times in my exam and thankfully, it normally happens before  I start writing a massive tangent that shows great knowledge, it just doesn’t help me answer the question I am being asked. If you find yourself getting confused then stop writing and re-read the question and re-look at your plan, Have you gone off track somewhere? Two Tips For Avoiding Exam Stress on Results Day Results day can be just as stressful as the exam day itself, but it is often overlooked. Psychology students are always nervous, anxious and concerned because this is the day that they’ve been waiting for and it determines a lot about their next year and even next few weeks. If they’ve done well then it means that they can progress to the next academic year with the confidence that they can take it a bit easier in their final year or whatever the next year is for them. If they haven’t done as well as they hoped then they either need to really focus in the next academic year, or in the next few weeks, they need to submit mitigation or prepare for resits. There are two big tips I will give you about results day. Firstly, open your results in a way that is comfortable to you. If you live at home, your parents or whoever you live with might be really excited and they might be putting pressure on you to open your results in front of them, or your friends might want to do it all together. Whereas you might actually want to open your results alone in your bed. Just do whatever you  want and open your results in a way that is most comfortable to you. These are your exam results. They do not belong to your parents or supporters or friends. Only you can decide how and when you open them. A minor tip that an ambassador mentioned during my talks was if you didn’t do as well as you hoped, allow yourself to feel that negative emotion. Take a few hours or a day to feel bad about your results because suppressing your emotions isn’t healthy. Then move on, plan your next academic year and do not let that bad result hold you back. The second and final tip for results day is take some time to celebrate and reflect on the past academic year. Think about what worked for you this academic year, what could have been better and use that knowledge to be more successful next year. And just celebrate and do something nice for yourself. Hang out with your friends, play video games, go out for a nice meal, just do whatever will help you celebrate. The hard work is over for another academic year and now you have a few months of freedom before the next year begins. Enjoy it. Psychology Student Life Conclusion I am rather surprised that in the past six years of The Psychology World Podcast, I have never done an episode on exam stress or revision. This is something I want to change and I am really grateful that there were schools that wanted these talks delivered and that Outreach picked me to deliver the talks. It was great interacting with the students and I really hope that you found this podcast episode as useful as the students did. I know that exams and results day can be stressful, concerning and you can really get yourself into a panic about them. Yet at the end of this psychology podcast episode, you now have a wide range of tips and tricks to hopefully help you avoid exam stress this season. Here are some questions to get you thinking at the end of this podcast episode: ·       Do you get stressed about exams, revision or results day? ·       How could you relax and practice self-care during the exam season? ·       How do you prepare for exams and could you improve your practices? ·       How do you cope with results day? And could improve your experience? ·       What could you do to celebrate your results after all the brilliant hard work that you’ve done this year?     I really hope you enjoyed today’s psychology student life psychology podcast episode. If you want to learn more, please check out: FREE 8 PSYCHOLOGY BOOK BOXSET Third Year Survival Guide: A Psychology Student’s Guide To The Final Year of Their Undergraduate Degree.  Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Patreon for exclusive access and rewards Have a great day. Psychology Student Life References and Further Reading Hitches, E., Woodcock, S., & Ehrich, J. (2022). Building self-efficacy without letting stress knock it down: Stress and academic self-efficacy of university students. International Journal of Educational Research Open, 3, 100124. Kumari, A., & Jain, J. (2014). Examination stress and anxiety: A study of college students. Global Journal of Multidisciplinary Studies, 4(1), 31-40. Marsidi, S. R. (2021). Identification of stress, anxiety, and depression levels of students in preparation for the exit exam competency test. Journal of Vocational Health Studies, 5(2), 87-93. Păduraru, M. E. (2018). Coping strategies for exam stress. Mental Health: Global Challenges Journal, 1(1), 64-66. Rajendran, V. G., Jayalalitha, S., & Adalarasu, K. (2022). EEG based evaluation of examination stress and test anxiety among college students. Ir bm ,  43 (5), 349-361. I truly hope that you’ve enjoyed this blog post and  if you feel like supporting the blog on an ongoing basis and get lots of rewards, then please head to my Patreon  page. However, if want to show one-time support and appreciation, the place to do that is PayPal. If you do that, please include your email address in the notes section, so I can say thank you. Which I am going to say right now. Thank you! Click  https://www.buymeacoffee.com/connorwhiteley  for a one-time bit of support.

At the time of writing, exam season for psychology students is just getting underway. I had my only exam three days ago and I know the second-year psychology students had their developmental psychology exam at the same time. Exam season involves a lot of revision, a little stress and students trying everything under the sun to improve their concentration and revision. Binaural beats are one such technique because they are meant to improve our concentration, be good for studying amongst other things. Yet what are binaural beats, how do binaural beats work, how effective are they and more. By the end of this cognitive psychology podcast episode, you’ll know the answers to all those questions and more about binaural beats. If you enjoy learning about biological psychology, cognitive psychology and how to improve your concentration then this will be a great episode for you. Today’s psychology podcast episode has been sponsored by Biological Psychology . Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. What Are Binaural Beats? Binaural beats are an auditory illusion because if you play two tones of slightly different frequencies in separate ears at the same time, the human brain perceives the creation of a third tone that is the difference in frequency between the two tones being played. For example, if you hear a tone of 405 Hertz in one ear then a tone of 415 hertz in the other ear then you would hear a binaural beat of 10 Hertz. In addition, binaural beats are believed to have a wide range of different benefits. Such as, binaural beats can help to lower stress, help with sleep and relaxation, boost our mood, foster creativity and increase focus as well as help with pain management. Nonetheless, some of these claims are just that, claims without any empirical support. Personally, the entire reason why I’m doing this psychology podcast episode is because last August my best friend was resitting one of their exams and they were telling me about their use of binaural beats. They wanted to know the literature behind it, because of course, every single psychology student just knows everything about every single aspect of human behaviour. I hate it when people think that. Therefore, I told my friend what I knew and now I want to understand binaural beats at a deeper level. How Do Binaural Beats Work? If you’ve done biological psychology before then you might be aware our brain waves operate at different frequencies and different brain waves are associated with different states. As a result, when making a binaural beat, both frequencies have to have a frequency below 1,500 hertz and the difference between them cannot be greater than 40 Hertz. Then the effect of the binaural beat depends on its frequency and the corresponding brain wave. For example, if the binaural beat has the same frequency as a beta wave (between 13 and 16 hertz) then this will help with awareness and alertness. If the beat has a frequency between 8 and 12 hertz like alpha waves then this helps with relaxation and meditation. If the beat has a frequency between 4 and 7 hertz like theta waves, then these brain waves are common in the lighter stages of sleep or the transition from waking to sleeping. It is binaural beats in this range that are more likely to promote sleep and relaxation. As well as delta waves (a frequency between 0.5 and 4 hertz) signify a deep sleep. What Is Entrainment? Interestingly, there is some evidence to suggest that the binaural beats can alter our brain waves because of the process of entrainment. This is where the brain waves align themselves to an outside beat or frequency, and because different brain waves are associated with different states of mind. This is why binaural beats are theorised to impact our focus, sleep and mood. This is why the concept of entrainment has gained popularity in recent years as a possible therapy for anxiety, concentration difficulties, insomnia amongst others. Personally, I think this is where my personal rule comes in because in my experience, if something “psychological” enters the mainstream and lots of laypeople are excited about it. Then it probably means that there is little research support for it, and when it comes to entrainment that seems to be the case. I would rather wait for more research to be done before declaring entrainment anything more than a theory in relation to binaural beats. Can Binaural Beats Get You High? Speaking of pop psychology rubbish, within popular culture, there is the idea that digital drugs can use sounds and music to induce a euphoric state similar to the happy states you get from LSD, cocaine and ecstasy. As digital drugs use recordings and these are based on binaural beats, some people argue that binaural beats can provide a natural sense of body relaxing whilst the mind expands. Yet honestly, the research into their effectiveness is very limited and very disputed. What Are The Potential Benefits of Binaural Beats? Binaural beats are meant to encourage the brain to transition from a more alert, higher-frequency state into a slower, more relaxed state at least according to the theory. There are some small studies that show this to be the case but other studies have found evidence that the changes in brainwave patterns might trigger hormonal changes. This leads to increases in melatonin and DHEA and decreased cortisol levels. Therefore, people who use binaural beats might report feeling more relaxed, experience increased focus, lower anxiety and better sleep and see improvements in their motivation as well as mood. When it comes to sleep, this is a very common use of binaural beats because during sleep the brain generates different types of brain waves depending on the stage of sleep and the current level of mental arousal. Theta and delta waves are associated with relaxation and deep sleep so binaural beats can be useful to help you sleep better because they shift the brain towards theta and delta-type brain waves. Depression is another use of binaural beats because if people with depression listen to binaural beats in the alpha, theta or delta range then this can provide some relief. The binaural beats might reduce depression in some people but most people with depression will get much better results if they try binaural beats alongside psychological therapy. Then if the client sees any negative side effects then it is best to stop immediately and consult a medical doctor or therapist. A final potential of binaural beats is treating anxiety. Several studies have shown that regularly listening to binaural beats in the delta and theta range can be relaxing and this might help reduce anxiety symptoms. Again though, research is still limited. Also, some researchers are investigating the use of binaural beats in a hospice setting to see whether they can help people who are dealing with end-of-life issues. How Effective Are Binaural Beats? The issue with research on binaural beats is that they are often small, preliminary studies with mixed results. Most experts agree that the risk of side effects from binaural beats is low and many podcasts, apps and other online services provide free access to binaural beats to boost relaxation or focus. In reality, we just don’t know if binaural beats are actually effective because the research is just not good enough at the moment. In my opinion, I would really like the research to improve on binaural beats by the studies being larger, more detailed and the studies to move away from being preliminary. I live with someone with ADHD, my partner has ADHD and even for myself, the ability to improve focus would be amazing at times. At the moment, I’m listening to a Demonslayer character theme mashup as I write this post, so I know that if binaural beats can actually improve focus and help improve lives that way. Then it could have great clinical implications too because if binaural beats could help people with ADHD whilst they’re on the waiting list for an assessment and ratlkin then it would be brilliant but until the research improves we simply will not know for sure. Cognitive Psychology Conclusion Yesterday, I told my best friend that I was doing a podcast episode on binaural beats this week and we had a conversation concluding in the statement the results would probably be inconclusive. I smile as I wrote this podcast episode because that is largely true, because binaural beats might have a lot of great potential but right now, it is just that. Potential. Until there is more research, more real experiments and larger studies done on binaural beats, we will never know with empirical certainty and rigour how effective binaural beats actually are in the real world. However, I don’t say this to be disheartening or cynical. I actually mention this fact because I really want there to be more research into binaural beats. As an aspiring clinical psychologist, I am always looking and interested in different easy interventions, techniques or tricks that are evidence-based that I could give my future clients or friends. It would be so useful to be able to recommend binaural beats to people with depression, ADHD or anxiety because whilst they’re on the waiting list for therapy, it would be invaluable to give them some kind of support in the meantime. Binaural beats could be that small support if only the research was better. Clinical psychology is about improving lives, decreasing psychological distress and giving clients more adaptive coping mechanisms to deal with stressful life events. The majority of this work, we can only ever do in therapy, but any support is better than nothing and if binaural beats is a recommendation we can give in the future whilst our clients wait for therapy. Then it is something we have to research, investigate and make a final conclusion on. Our clients’ happiness and ability to function might depend on it. Here are some questions to get you thinking at the end of this psychology podcast episode: ·       Have you ever used binaural beats and did you find them useful? ·       Would you recommend binaural beats to your friends? ·       Where do you think binaural beats might fit into psychological interventions in the future?   I really hope you enjoyed today’s social psychology podcast episode. If you want to learn more, please check out: FREE 8 PSYCHOLOGY BOOK BOXSET Biological Psychology . Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Patreon for exclusive access and rewards Have a great day. Cognitive Psychology and Biological Psychology References and Further Reading Baseanu, I. C. C., Roman, N. A., Minzatanu, D., Manaila, A., Tuchel, V. I., Basalic, E. B., & Miclaus, R. S. (2024). The Efficiency of Binaural Beats on Anxiety and Depression—A Systematic Review. Applied Sciences, 14(13), 5675. Gupta, A., Ramdinmawii, E., & Mittal, V. K. (2016, December). Significance of alpha brainwaves in meditation examined from the study of binaural beats. In 2016 International Conference on Signal Processing and Communication (ICSC) (pp. 484-489). IEEE. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/binaural-beats Ingendoh, R. M., Posny, E. S., & Heine, A. (2023). Binaural beats to entrain the brain? A systematic review of the effects of binaural beat stimulation on brain oscillatory activity, and the implications for psychological research and intervention. Plos one, 18(5), e0286023. Kraus, J., & Porubanová, M. (2015). The effect of binaural beats on working memory capacity. Studia psychologica, 57(2), 135. Lin, P. H., Fu, S. H., Lee, Y. C., Yang, S. Y., & Li, Y. L. (2024). Examining the effects of binaural beat music on sleep quality, heart rate variability, and depression in older people with poor sleep quality in a long‐term care institution: A randomized controlled trial. Geriatrics & gerontology international, 24(3), 297-304. Reedijk, S. A., Bolders, A., & Hommel, B. (2013). The impact of binaural beats on creativity. Frontiers in human neuroscience, 7, 786. Yusim, A., & Grigaitis, J. (2020). Efficacy of binaural beat meditation technology for treating anxiety symptoms: a pilot study.  The Journal of nervous and mental disease ,  208 (2), 155-160. I truly hope that you’ve enjoyed this blog post and  if you feel like supporting the blog on an ongoing basis and get lots of rewards, then please head to my Patreon  page. However, if want to show one-time support and appreciation, the place to do that is PayPal. If you do that, please include your email address in the notes section, so I can say thank you. Which I am going to say right now. Thank you! Click  https://www.buymeacoffee.com/connorwhiteley  for a one-time bit of support.

Whenever a client comes into our therapy room or whenever you meet a psychologist, they have certain privileges and disadvantages that you don't have. Also, you’ll both have different life experiences, perspectives and focuses that you will share and you will differ in. This is because every one of us is wonderfully unique with our own thoughts, feelings and lived experiences. Yet as aspiring and qualified psychologists, we need to acknowledge that we have certain social graces or privileges that our clients don't have and vice versa. Therefore, in this clinical psychology podcast episode, you'll going to learn what are social graces, what are some types of social graces and how social graces can impact the therapy process. If you enjoy learning about psychotherapy, clinical psychology and privilege then this will be a great episode for you.  Today's psychology podcast episode has been sponsored by Moral Psychology: Introduction to the Social Psychology, Biological Psychology and Applied Psychology of Morality.  Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. What Are Social Graces in Clinical Psychology? Social graces is an acronym that helps us to understand the visible and invisible aspects of our identity, so this allows mental health professionals to examine the elements of our identity that impact our behaviour and lives. This is what each letter of the Graces in social graces mean: ·       G- Gender, Generation, Geography, Gender Identity and Geography ·       R- race and religion ·       A- age, appearance and ability ·       C- culture, caste and class ·       E- education, economics and ethnicity ·       S- sexuality, sexual orientation and spirituality In addition, social graces is a framework designed by Burnham (1993) and updated in 2012 that asks mental health practitioners to be aware of how their identity influences their thinking and approach to work. Since social graces focus on how different aspects of our identity impact our practice. Some academic definitions of social graces include: ·       “A mnemonic that separates out different aspects of identity into separate categories.” (Butler, 2017, p. 17) ·       “Mnemonic for aspects of difference” (Jones & Reeve, 2014, p. 2) ·       “A suitable framework […] through which therapists can reflect on their own beliefs and prejudices in order to understand how they might bring these into the therapy” (Totsuka, 2014, p. 106) Therefore, some quick examples of how thinking about social graces can impact clinical practice is, if you’re a young and beautiful young woman (age, appearance and gender) how might these social factors impact your clinical practice compared to a middle-aged woman with an average appearance? The middle-aged woman would likely have more clinical experience than the young woman, yet the young woman would probably be treated better and have advantages because of her youth and attractive appearance. Yet both women because of their gender would be unlikely to face one or two gender stereotypes compared to male therapists. Due to the myth in society that women are more sensitive, caring and better therapists than men. On the other hand, men would have a lot of benefits compared to women because of the patriarchal society we live in. Personally, if I look at myself briefly, I am a young 24-year-old white non-binary person who was assigned male at birth and I look male in appearance. I am from a middle-class background, I’m gay and in terms of sexuality, I am not very active and I have only ever had one relationship. All these different social factors would impact my clinical practice in different ways. For example, whilst I’m aware of a lot of social issues, especially those faced by people from lower socioeconomic backgrounds, I will never be able to fully understand the impact because I have not experienced them myself because of my class. Also, when I work with heterosexual clients, again I have a great awareness of heterosexual relationships but because I’m gay and I’ve only ever had one relationship, my understanding will be limited. However, because of biological sex and appearance, I get a lot of male privilege that other clients and practitioners don’t get and I’ll be able to help and support autistic, LGBT+ and trauma survivors a lot in my clinical practice because I’ve lived those experiences too. What Is The Purpose of Social Graces? The social graces framework is useful because it allows psychologists, counsellors, educators and therapists to talk about aspects of our identity and how they might impact how we relate to other people. Therefore, it’s designed to make identity factors a part of our clinical discussions about our personal privileges and disadvantages that we face in society. This includes our own implicit biases because once our biases are identified, we can help neutralise them so we can become more thoughtful, fair and effective practitioners. Nolte (2017) page 4 mentioned: “provides a helpful way for us to become intentional in our developing awareness of, reflexivity about and skillfulness in responding to sameness and difference.” Because I want to lead by example here, I know I can sometimes be biased against different classes, which is weird because I come from a very, very deprived area. Therefore, because I make myself aware of my classist attitudes, I’m able to catch myself and stop the thought and biased attitude in its tracks. Moreover, Partridge and McCarry (2017) argued that the framework can help psychologists to use our reflections to inform our future actions so it gets us to think about how we can ensure that we are fairer in the future. Social graces can help us to reflect on our actions in the first place so we can think about how our identity influenced a situation, and social graces allow us to subvert the dominant discourse. This involves psychologists considering how to rethink ongoing behaviours that give privilege to dominant social identities, like white, male, middle-class, able individuals. Lastly, social graces allow us to consider new alternatives for future actions so we can come up with new ways to behave that are fairer. Going back to my classism example, when I find that I’ve been classist against someone or a group of people then this is me reflecting on my action and realising is my own class that is making me behave this way. Therefore, in future, I need to make sure I am fairer and I need to subvert the dominant course. This is one of the many reasons why I love my Outreach work because every week I get to work with students and young people from deprived areas and help them realise that university is a great and achievable option for them if they want to go. This helps rebalance the social scales so university isn’t reserved for dominant social identities, and anyone can go and apply regardless of their age, race, gender, socioeconomic status and more. What Are The Key Features of Social Graces? Firstly, all aspects of identity are equally important to the social graces framework. Burnham (2003) proposed that all the aspects of our identity should be considered equally important because whilst Gender, Geography and Generation come before Race and Religion in the framework, this does not mean they are more important. Each of the Graces are meant to be examined individually without being drowned out by any of the others. Secondly, the social graces framework is always evolving because people will naturally add and subtract from it. Since psychologists can use the framework practically by starting a therapy session by asking people what other aspects of identity they could add to the framework. For instance, if you’re working with a refugee then they might add their refugee experience and status to the framework, and if you’re working with an indigenous person then they will add their indigenous experience to the framework because they are core, fundamental parts of their identity. These new aspects are still just as important as any if the pre-existing aspects in the framework. Finally, the social graces framework makes the aspects of our identity explicit and visible. As a result of our identity and the different aspects of it isn’t often spoken about or given room to be discussed inside or outside the therapy room. This means the framework gives us a chance to discuss our thoughts on the unsaid aspects of our identity in addition to the aspects that we wear on our sleeves. For example, some unsaid aspects of my identity generally my thoughts on religion, my sexuality, my sexual orientation, my gender identity amongst others. Whereas I happily wear the age, generation, biological sex, education amongst others on my sleeve. On the whole, when in therapy sessions, social graces can be discussed with clients to get both the client and therapist thinking about how each aspect of identity impacts their thoughts and behaviour. For example, when clients and therapists talk about education, they can talk about how their education background influences their views, and when people talk about generation, they could talk about their lives growing up and how the attitudes and behaviours of different generations impact their views nowadays. Such as, if my Grandad who was born in the Silent Generation was to discuss his generation then he would talk about how you didn’t show emotion, you didn’t show that you were upset and you certainly did not talk about your feelings or complain as part of that generation. Then a therapist would explore how those attitudes impact his daily life and behaviour now, and whether these are still adaptive or maladaptive attitudes to have these days. What are The Advantages of the Social Graces Framework? Firstly, a great benefit of the social graces framework is that it helps us to see our own implicit biases because when we examine the aspects of our identities, this allows us to think about how they shape our actions and views about our self, others and the world. Then by talking about these aspects we can eliminate or, at least, minimise implicit biases in our clinical practice. Secondly, the framework is great because it helps people to understand identity. I would add that this is very useful as a potential psychoeducation tool for our clients because identity is a very abstract concept, so by providing a framework to our clients that helps to facilitate a discussion. This is a really useful way to make an abstract concept slightly more tangible for our clients. As well as the framework is a useful way to examine with our clients how aspects of our identity impact our beliefs and perspectives. Lastly, another advantage of the social graces framework is it makes us talk about the invisible and unsaid aspects of our identity. I mean without this framework, we wouldn’t talk about a lot of aspects of identity, because most aspects are often overlooked or ignored because they’re invisible. It’s really common to talk about gender, sexual orientation, race, age and education because we largely see these social factors. Yet it is rare to talk about generation, sexuality amongst others. This means it’s useful that clients and psychologists can talk through each aspect one by one to make sure nothing is overlooked. What Are The Disadvantages of The Social Graces Framework? The first major disadvantage of this framework is the very fact that it is a framework and not theory. This means that whilst it is a useful tool for thinking about identity, this isn’t a theory that offers us an explanation of how the world works. In other words, social graces should not be considered the same as Critical Whiteness Theory, Critical Race Theory of Intersectional Theory because each of these valuable and insightful theories offers us an explanation for how the world works. Instead the social graces framework only offers us a chance for important discussions to be had about social identity biases, so some people argue the lack of explanation about the world is a disadvantage. In addition, a final disadvantage of the framework is that it completely fails to understand just how complex our identities are. At some point in the next year, I have a book coming out called Your Unshakable Self  and I’m really looking forward to that book being released because it explores a lot about our sense of Self, our identity and all the different ways how it impacts our behaviour. This social graces framework shouldn’t cover the majority of what I talk about in this book, and another sub-issue of the framework is that it is the complete opposite of Intersectional Theory according to Bulter (2017). Intersectional Theory sees the intersectional identities as unique, impossible to talk about separately and you cannot neatly separable out our identities. I completely agree with Butler (2017) because if we talk some aspects of my identity. You cannot talk about the sexuality part of my identity without talking about my sexual orientation, my gender identity, my biological sex, race and my class. Since the very fact that I am a gay non-binary person assigned male at birth who’s white and middle-aged who has very little romantic or sexual experience. Fundamentally means all these factors insect and interact to inform my views and perspectives about myself, others and the world. Equally, you cannot talk about me being a clinical psychology Masters student (education) without considering how I’m white, from the south of England and from a nationally deprived area. All those social identities impact on my educational journey and impact my views. Those are only some examples about how you can’t treat aspects of identity separately. On the whole, Butler (2017) argued that breaking down our identity into separate categories fails to understand just how complex our identities are. As well as the framework seeks to look at identity as a “sum of its parts” instead of an indivisible and holistic concept. Clinical Psychology and Social Psychology Conclusion After struggling for a few months to understand social graces and what they actually were because in my lectures, the social graces framework was always just skipped over. I am really happy that I took the time to think about social graces because they are flat out critical to understand, we should be having these conversations and we should be reflecting and always wanting to be fair. And having social graces doesn’t make us a problem in society, people will always have social graces that others do not have and vice versa, but if we do not reflect on our biases and think about how our social identities impact our and if we are not proactive in becoming fairer. Then this is where our social graces become a problem because we should always be striving to make society better, fairer and more equal for everyone regardless of their social graces. Ultimately, Burnham et al. gave us a very useful way of looking at how our social identities impact our implicit biases. As well as this is a valuable discussion tool to help mental health professionals think about how best we can counter our own biases so we can better achieve social justice. Everyone deserves to be treated fairer, compassionately and equally in society, let alone our therapy rooms. So if having discussions about social graces is the way to achieve these outcomes then it is something we absolutely have to do. And you’ll likely learn a lot of fun, interesting and surprising things along the way.   I really hope you enjoyed today’s social psychology podcast episode. If you want to learn more, please check out: FREE 8 PSYCHOLOGY BOOK BOXSET Moral Psychology: Introduction to the Social Psychology, Biological Psychology and Applied Psychology of Morality.  Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Patreon for exclusive access and rewards Have a great day. Clinical Psychology References and Further Reading Birdsey, N., & Kustner, C. (2021). Reviewing the social GRACES: what do they add and limit in systemic thinking and practice?. T he American journal of family therapy ,  49 (5), 429-442. Burnham, J. & Roper-Hall, A. (2017) Commentaries on this issue.  Context , 151, 47-50. Burnham, J. (1992) Approach-method-technique: Making distinctions and creating connections.  Human Systems ,  3 (1), 3-26. Burnham, J. (1993) Systemic supervision: The evolution of refl exivity in the context of the supervisory relationship.  Human Systems ,  4 , 349- 381. Burnham, J. (2005) Relational reflexivity: A tool for socially constructing therapeutic relationships. In: C. Flaskas, B. Mason & A. Perlesz (eds.),  The space between: Experience, context and process in the therapeutic relationship . London: Karnac. Burnham, J. (2012) Developments in social GRRRAAACCEEESSS: Visible-invisible and voicedunvoiced. In I-B. Krause (Ed.)  Culture and Reflexivity in Systemic Psychotherapy . Mutual Perspectives. London: Karnac. Burnham, J. (2018). Developments in Social GRRRAAACCEEESSS: visible–invisible and voiced–unvoiced 1. In Culture and reflexivity in systemic psychotherapy (pp. 139-160). Routledge. Butler, C. (2017). Intersectionality and systemic therapy, Context, 151, pp. 16-18. Cockell, S. (2017) Exploration of attire as an unvoiced ‘GRACE’. Context, 151, 19-22. Jones, V. & Reeve, D. (2014). DISsing the Social GGGRRAAACCEEESSS. Paper presented at the AFT Conference. University of South Wales. Jones, V. (2019). Diversity IS GRACE–Using the'Social Graces' to Promote Reflection on Diversity.  Working with People with Learning Disabilities: Systemic Approaches , 243. Nolte, L. (2017). (Dis)gracefully engaging with diversity learning – reflections on the SGs as a training tool.  Context , 151. pp. 4-6. ISSN 09691936 Partridge, K. & McCarry, N. (2017). Graces that bite: Unleashing the GRR in the graces.  Context , 151. pp. 7-10. ISSN 09691936 Totsuka, Y. (2014). ‘Which aspects of social GGRRAAACCEEESSS grab you most?’ The social GGRRAAACCEEESSS exercise for a supervision group to promote therapists’ self‐reflexivity.  Journal of family Therapy, 36, 86-106. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1111/1467-6427.12026 I truly hope that you’ve enjoyed this blog post and  if you feel like supporting the blog on an ongoing basis and get lots of rewards, then please head to my Patreon  page. However, if want to show one-time support and appreciation, the place to do that is PayPal. If you do that, please include your email address in the notes section, so I can say thank you. Which I am going to say right now. Thank you! Click  https://www.buymeacoffee.com/connorwhiteley  for a one-time bit of support.

I don’t think anyone can go through their psychology journey without encountering any myths about psychology. A few years ago at a gender reveal party, I was talking to my brother’s dad (we have different ones) and he explained how he needed to see a psychologist because of an injury before he could go to work. Yet when he was younger and even now, he wouldn’t do it because everyone back then knew psychologists only saw “crazy” people. After I explained the types of people who psychologists actually helped, he was more relaxed about going. This is just one out of the millions of myths that psychology and psychologists face every day. Therefore, in this clinical psychology podcast episode, you’ll learn about the “crazy people” myth about psychology, who psychologists help and more about clinical psychology in the real world. If you enjoy learning about psychology myths, careers in psychology and mental health then this is a great episode for you. Today’s psychology podcast episode has been sponsored by Myths About Clinical Psychology: A Psychology Student's and Professional's Guide To Myths About Clinical Psychology . Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. WHY PSYCHOLOGISTS DO NOT ONLY DEAL WITH CRAZY PEOPLE? (Extract from Myths About Clinical Psychology by Connor Whiteley  COPYRIGHT 2025) If there is any psychology myth that is going to get me on my soapbox then it is definitely going to be this myth because there was so much to unpack and I'm actually really excited about this chapter. Therefore, in this myth chapter we're going to be focusing on the stupid idea that psychologists only deal with so-called crazy people. This is going to be a lot of fun. Little Recap So the main reason why this myth is automatically wrong is because it builds on the idea that only mental health professionals and clinical psychologists are psychologists. Also, this myth completely forgets there are other types of psychologists. For example, business psychologists, social psychologists, experimental psychologists, academic psychologists, and on and on and on. Therefore, even if this myth was true and psychologists only saw crazy people (I absolutely hate saying that) then it would just be impractical for psychology to only see crazy people. For example, you might be able to argue that a social psychologist and an academic psychologist might meet with a crazy person for academic research. But I would have no idea and no explanation as to why the hell a business psychologist would want to work with a crazy person because business psychologists only really working HR departments. Therefore, this myth is just unpractical from a practicality standpoint and how the psychology job market actually works. What Even Are Crazy People? Now then if we jump on my soapbox for a moment what the hell are crazy people. I have no idea what crazy people actually are because it just comes back to this myth in general society that only crazy people like Psychopaths, murderers, evil abuses and paedophiles have mental health difficulties. It is one of the most disgusting myths ever that if you have a mental health difficulty then you're a crazy person, you're dangerous, you’re insecure, you are unstable, you're going to hurt someone or kill someone. Like forgive my language but is absolute bullshit. I absolutely fucking hate this myth because it is so dangerous, disgusting and these people just need to learn what psychology actually involves. And even if someone was apparently crazy in terms of being psychotic for example. It doesn't mean that they are a bad person, it doesn't mean they don't deserve support, it doesn't mean they deserve to be helped any less than anyone else. Because people with psychosis can live good lives, they can receive mental health support and they can do really good things about their lives if given the right mental health support and treatment. The very idea that just because someone's crazy according to this horrible societal myth or idea about what a bad person looks like. It's just horrific because even a psychotic person still deserves good treatment, good support and to live a good life. I just absolutely hate this myth that says certain people just because they have sudden conditions are lesser or dangerous or they’re evil. Of course, I am not saying that psychopaths, sociopaths and some people with psychotic disorders are perfect or nice and they don't commit crimes. Yet the idea that you would want to tarnish an entire clinical population with the same brush and say all of them are bad people that are going to commit crimes and hurt people is disgusting. Anyway, that is my rant over and that is me jumping off my soapbox because I hate this idea that there are crazy people in the world and it is absolute fucking bullshit. What’s the Truth? Let's now look into what clinical psychologists actually deal with and the amazing people that they help. So in reality clinical psychologists help and they deal with anyone has a mental health difficulty or mental health condition. Some examples of these mental health conditions or difficulties can include suicidal idealization, depression, anxiety, self-harm, eating disorders, or disordered eating to be honest. Trauma survivors with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder is another possible group too. As we can already see clinical psychologists deal with a lot of different conditions and people and some of them are really normal. For example, neurodivergence, like ADHD and autism, and clinical psychologists can also deal with learning disabilities. And it is this really wide range of people that you get to deal with and you get to help that makes me love psychology and really makes me love clinical psychology even more because you can do so much with it. Since at the time of writing in February 2024 so far, I've done two major bits of psychology work experience and I've done tons of different bits and pieces on the side. I've worked with people with learning disabilities and this was quite wide-ranging and if you go check out the backlist of The Psychology World Podcast, you can actually find the episode that I wrote about my experience. And then I've also worked with transgender individuals at a Gender Identity Clinic, which I really loved. So as you can see just from those two really simple examples I worked with such different people with different needs, different mental health difficulties and they were in very different situations. And then a final example before I start making my point about the truth behind this myth is that I've also spoken about this on the podcast before and I do have A Memoir and it might be out by the time this book's released, but I've also been through some trauma and abuse and I went for mental health support I went for person-centred counselling. And the very idea that I'm crazy, I’m messed up and I have a problem just because I needed some counselling, I think it's very disgusting to be honest. Not so much hurtful because I've heard it all before but I think the fact that people want to judge me for what I went through and how I dealt with it is beyond disgusting and I just don't understand it. Like the very idea that someone says I'm a bad person for what other people did to me and how other people traumatised me and how others abused me, I think is laughable. Due to you can tell that these people who are saying these things just don't understand what it's like to go through certain stuff. And if you've read any of my books, if you listen to my podcast and I hope that you've understood this through my tone and how passionate I am in these chapters, I hope you know that I'm a lovely person, I love helping people and all I want to do is support our amazing clients in the future when I do become a clinical psychologist. Overall, this serves as a great segway into my point about what the truth behind this myth is, in reality, clinical psychologists deal with normal people with normal mental health difficulties in normal situations, and sometimes extremely abnormal situations, like abuse and trauma. Clinical psychologists deal with people that laugh, that love their families, have children, are sons, mothers, daughters, and children, and maybe trans. They are just normal people. These clients that clinical psychologists have to deal with like going out with their friends at the weekend and they might drink. They like having fun with their friends, they like watching TV, they might like reading, they might like watching movies just like you. All these people that clinical psychologists have to deal with that makes them different from other people is just that they’re brave enough, they're courageous enough and they are amazing enough to admit they need mental health support to improve their lives, decrease their psychological distress, and give themselves power. To me that makes them flat out amazing and I will not have anyone saying they're crazy or bad or evil people just because of some stupid myth. And if my passion in this chapter has offended some belief of yours. Then I'm not sorry because this is such a dangerous annoying myth that I do want to stamp out because it's not fair on our client so it isn't fair on people like me who've had mental health experiences and it's just a disgusting myth that Society does need to remove.   I really hope you enjoyed today’s social psychology podcast episode. If you want to learn more, please check out: FREE 8 PSYCHOLOGY BOOK BOXSET Myths About Clinical Psychology: A Psychology Student's and Professional's Guide To Myths About Clinical Psychology . Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Patreon for exclusive access and rewards Have a great day. Clinical Psychology Reference and Further Reading Whiteley, C. (2025) Myths About Clinical Psychology: A Psychology Student's and Professional's Guide To Myths About Clinical Psychology. CGD Publishing. England. I truly hope that you’ve enjoyed this blog post and if you feel like supporting the blog on an ongoing basis and get lots of rewards, then please head to my Patreon  page. However, if want to show one-time support and appreciation, the place to do that is PayPal. If you do that, please include your email address in the notes section, so I can say thank you. Which I am going to say right now. Thank you! Click  https://www.buymeacoffee.com/connorwhiteley  for a one-time bit of support.

If you’re a UK listener living in Kent then you might have heard on the radio recently an advert by Kent County Council about the awful and damaging impact consistent arguing and parental conflict can have on child development. After hearing this advert a few times, I wanted to learn more and it’s really interesting how parental conflict negatively impacts a child’s development at no fault of their own. Therefore, in this social psychology podcast episode, you’ll learn how parental conflict damages a child’s development, how to reduce conflict between parents and more. If you’re interested in child psychology, conflict reduction and social psychology then this will be a great episode for you. Today’s psychology podcast episode has been sponsored by Developmental Psychology: A Guide To Developmental and Child Psychology . Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Why Do We Need To Talk About Conflict Between Parents? I’ll explain in the next section the damaging impact that parental conflict has on a child, but I want to start off this psychology podcast episode by mentioning that it is normal to argue and for there to be conflict in a relationship. There will be things in your life that just annoy you. Be it work, home life or just being a parent, these things can cause you to become stressed and agitated. It’s okay, and this can cause a lot of friction in a household so arguing and shouting happens. Unfortunately, there are times when this happens in front of children. I want to stress that some conflict is normal because it truly is and not all conflict is damaging to children. If parents didn’t argue at all then I would be more suspicious of that because I don’t know a single couple, a single group of parents and a single friendship that has not argued at least once. However, there will be times when this parental conflict can increase to unhealthy levels. This could be screaming at each other and shouting without a resolution, communicating to each other in disrespectful ways or periods of silence. This is not healthy communication at all and this is persistent and/ or extreme source of conflict that damages child development. Not only in terms of their mental health, but it can damage the relationship between the child and parent too. No parent wants interparental conflict to harm their relationship with their own child so that’s why we need to learn about how to reduce it. How Does Constant Parental Conflict Harm Child Development? There are a lot of significant ways how constant or consistent parental conflict can harm child development. For example, it can harm a child’s emotional and psychological well-being since persistent exposure to parental conflict can lead to a child becoming emotionally insecure. This can manifest as depression, anxiety or behavioural difficulties (Cummings & Schatz, 2012; Hess, 2021; Sarrazin & Cyr, 2007). These harmful effects can become worse because typically children feel caught in the middle of their parents’ conflict so this increases feelings of stress and helplessness. In addition, the sheer levels of stress and other difficult emotions caused by persistent parental conflict can harm academic performance in children. The associated stress can impair a child’s cognitive functioning and concentration so they can’t focus on lessons so this academic performance worsens. Another negative outcome of persistent parental conflict is it harms a child’s social development. Since research shows increased parental conflict correlates with reduced prosocial behaviour and an increase in problems with same-age peers in children (Sarrazin & Cyr, 2007). As well as these social difficulties can become worse because of parental behaviour. For instance, if a parent doesn’t show a child emotional warmth or positive communication then the child won’t know how to show emotional warmth and positive communication either. This continues to only harm their relationships with other children and people. Finally, for this section, it’s important that we realise these harmful effects of parental conflict aren’t short-term that only lasts a few years. These damaging, awful effects can last well into adulthood and it can and will continue to harm a child’s self-esteem, social relationships and their overall mental health (Hess, 2021). Personally, I know at the end of the day all of us are only human, we all make mistakes and there are times when we just want the other person to listen to us just for once in their life. We want them to pay attention and hear our side of the story. Sometimes, it feels like shouting, screaming and having a real argument is the only way to possibly get through to them. And sometimes when the other parent is talking to us about silly things after a hard day’s work, we snap. We are only human. However, I have just listed four ways how persistent parental conflict impacts our child’s development. I am not a parent and I can only imagine how hard it is to raise a child, but we need to try to reduce parental conflict as much as possible. There are other ways to sort out conflicts because conflicts will always happen in relationships, but there are healthy ways to sort out conflicts that do not end up damaging your child’s development. How To Reduce Parental Conflict? Now we know the damaging impact parental conflict can have on children, let’s look at some ways we can reduce parental conflict. Although, it’s important to remember that whenever it comes to conflict within relationships, you need to keep yourself safe. This means if you ever feel threatened or unsafe by your partner, then this is not okay. No one should ever feel unsafe or threatened by their partner and if your relationship has become abusive, then please seek support for domestic abuse. You deserve and need to feel safe in your own home. One way to reduce interparental conflict is to avoid using the “you” word. As I’ve been researching and learning a lot more about attachment and how to deal with conflict in relationships, this is a consistent piece of advice that I’ve seen repeatedly. The issue of using “you” statements in arguments is that these statements make the other person feel targeted and like you’re accusing them of something. This leads the other person to become more defensive, so try to use “I” statements instead. For instance, let’s say your co-parent is meant to pick up the kids every Tuesday and Friday because those are the days you have to work longer for your job. Yet every Tuesday and Friday your co-parent never picks up the kids like they’re meant to so you need to rely on a friend at the same school to take your kids to your co-parents. Instead of saying “you never pick up the kids when you’re meant to and you annoy me,” try saying something along the lines of “I feel annoyed when you don’t pick up the kids on Tuesdays and Fridays like we agreed.” You see how that’s less accusatory than the “you” statement version. Thirdly, in relationships, it’s important to recognise how you argue. At first this idea might make no sense because surely everyone just argues and there are no different types. In reality, all couples and parents need to understand how they communicate to each other and how you communicate arguments and disagreements to each other is an important part of this process. Especially, if you and your partner both approach arguments with very different styles. For instance, you might be a very calm, collected person who deals with conflict and arguments in a calm, logical manner where you focus on solutions instead of negative emotions. If your partner is the exact opposite and they prefer to shout and scream and they get even more angry when you don’t show negative emotions as well. Then this can only make the arguments worse so it’s important to recognise how you both argue and how best to deal with your different approaches. Two final aspects of this recognition part of parental conflict is to make sure you think about what triggers you and your partner. It will definitely take some time to think about and identify some of the issues that might trigger a strong reaction in you or your partner. Most people just go through their entire lives without giving this much thought and this leads to a lot of negative relationship patterns because the couple aren’t able to identify triggers and adapt their behaviour to deal with these triggering topics in a healthier way. Finally, my main audience on The Psychology World Podcast are aspiring or qualified psychologists or people interested in psychology. Active listening skills are a massive part of our profession and whilst I strongly discourage you from bringing your therapy skills into the home because no partner wants to feel like a client. Yet listening to your partner or co-parent without interruption is flat out critical for reducing parental conflict because everyone wants to feel heard. Therefore, even if you have an important point to make or counter what they’ve said, just allow your partner to finish what they’re saying and try to see the conflict from their point of view before responding. How To Reduce Parental Conflict By Taking A Break, Being Open To Compromise and Choosing the Right Time? Three more ways to reduce parental conflict includes if you can’t stay calm during an argument or conflict, then please take a break. I don’t think it’s possible to avoid conflict with heated emotions forever. Even for myself who never really tends to get angry or show heated emotions, there are times when I do get angry and I can show a lot of heated emotions. When these situations arise, it is normally a good idea to take a break so both people in the conflict can take some time to cool down so when you next come back to the conversation it will hopefully go better. Penultimately, in any sort of conflict, it’s important to choose the right time to address issues and this is something I’ve learnt over the past few weeks. It turns out that a major difference between people with anxious attachment and avoidant attachment is that a person with anxious attachment tends to want to resolve conflict immediately even if this is a bad time when the other person doesn’t want to engage in conflict. Whereas an avoidant person will avoid discussing and resolving conflict at all. I mention these attachment facts because I recently learnt with some conflict in my house that I wanted to resolve conflict immediately but the moment I picked was not a good time for the other person and this made the conflict even worse. Therefore, if you want to talk to your partner or co-parent about an important issue then it’s best if you make sure you give yourselves enough time to talk about the issue. Ideally, this discussion will happen somewhere where you won’t be interrupted or overheard, so it’s a good idea to set aside some time to have a proper conversation when it suits you both. Finally, you can reduce parental conflict by being open to compromise. I know from experience that when we’re in an argument with heated emotions, we can just focus on “winning” an argument and making sure that we are the ones who walk away with the best result. The problem with this approach to arguments is that it means we don’t tend to teach a solution with our partner, so this isn’t a helpful way of resolving issues. Therefore, it’s more helpful to be clear with your co-parent about what you’re willing to compromise on and what you won’t. Boundaries are critical in all relationships and this is another boundary exercise, what are you flexible on and what aren’t you. Interestingly, once you start thinking about compromise you’ll probably realise some of these areas that you could never originally compromise on are actually less important than you thought. Social Psychology Conclusion Life is stressful and I cannot imagine how hard it is raising a child with the stressors of work, home life, friendships, relationships and so many other factors on top of that. Parenting and life as an adult is not easy. Therefore, it is normal for parents to argue because sometimes we all just need a release when our stressors get to unbearable levels. That isn’t the problem. The problem is when parental conflict and arguments become often and extreme. This only damages your child’s development by harming their physical, emotional and social development. As well as it harms their academic performance and parental conflict has long-term effects that can ensure the harmful damage effects conflict inflicts on children lasts long into adulthood. This is why it’s critical that parents learn how to reduce conflict by focusing on keeping themselves safe, understand how both parents argument, avoid using “you” statements and use “I” statements instead, if parents cannot stay calm then take a break, and choose the right time to address issues and listen without interrupting your partner. As well as it’s helpful to know what triggers you and your partner and most importantly, be open to compromise in conflict. Parental conflict doesn’t have to escalate to damaging levels, it is avoidable if parents take a step back, learn how to deal with their emotions and conflict better and focus on doing this for the betterment of their child. Reducing conflict does take work and a lot of effort but if it means ensuring your child has the best and healthiest start in life, doesn’t that make it all worth it? Here are some questions to get you thinking at the end of this social psychology podcast episode: ·       How often did your parents argue when you were a kid? ·       How do you argue now? ·       What triggers you and your partner in a relationship? ·       What unhealthy ways of communicating might you and your partner have? ·       How could you and your partner reduce conflict in your relationship?     I really hope you enjoyed today’s social psychology podcast episode. If you want to learn more, please check out: FREE 8 PSYCHOLOGY BOOK BOXSET Developmental Psychology: A Guide To Developmental and Child Psychology . Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Patreon for exclusive access and rewards Have a great day. Social Psychology References and Further Reading Amjad, M. J., Nawaz, A. H., & Zubair, M. (2024). Parental Conflicts and Child Socialization: An Impact Analysis of Parent Stress in Southern Punjab, Pakistan. Review of Law and Social Sciences, 2(4), 09-19. Bate, J., Pham, P. T., & Borelli, J. L. (2021). Be my safe haven: Parent–child relationships and emotional health during COVID-19. Journal of pediatric psychology, 46(6), 624-634. Cummings, E. M., & Schatz, J. N. (2012). Family conflict, emotional security, and child development: translating research findings into a prevention program for community families. Clinical Child and Family Psychology Review, 15, 14-27. He, D., Niu, G., Hu, Y., Song, K., Zhou, Z., & Fan, C. (2024). The relationship between parental conflict and adolescent cyberbullying: the roles of parent-child attachment and core self-evaluation. Current Psychology, 43(9), 8230-8240. Hess, S. (2022). Effects of inter-parental conflict on children’s social well-being and the mediation role of parenting behavior. Applied Research in Quality of Life, 17(4), 2059-2085. https://www.kent.gov.uk/education-and-children/kent-family-hub/mental-health-and-family-relationships/reducing-arguments-and-conflict-between-parents Jones, J. H., Call, T. A., Wolford, S. N., & McWey, L. M. (2021). Parental stress and child outcomes: The mediating role of family conflict. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 30, 746-756. Özaslan, A., Yıldırım, M., Güney, E., Güzel, H. Ş., & İşeri, E. (2022). Association between problematic internet use, quality of parent-adolescents relationship, conflicts, and mental health problems. International Journal of Mental Health and Addiction, 20(4), 2503-2519. Sarrazin, J., & Cyr, F. (2007). Parental Conflicts and Their Damaging Effects on Children. Journal of Divorce & Remarriage, 47(1-2), 77–93. https://doi.org/10.1300/J087v47n01_05 I truly hope that you’ve enjoyed this blog post and if you feel like supporting the blog on an ongoing basis and get lots of rewards, then please head to my Patreon  page. However, if want to show one-time support and appreciation, the place to do that is PayPal. If you do that, please include your email address in the notes section, so I can say thank you. Which I am going to say right now. Thank you! Click  https://www.buymeacoffee.com/connorwhiteley  for a one-time bit of support.

Rape and other forms of sexual violence is beyond awful. It is one of the worse, most traumatic and devastating things that can happen to a person. During sexual violence, someone takes everything away from you, your control, your consent, your ability to do anything at all. You just go into survival mode and the consequences of sexual violence are immense. There isn’t a single area of your life that sexual violence isn’t impacted by. Therefore, in this clinical psychology podcast episode, to mark the one-year anniversary of my rape, I want to explain the highs, lows and lessons from the past year as I survived my rape and everything I had to deal with afterwards. There were a lot of awful, horrific things that I had to deal with as a rape survivor in the past year, but there have been some highs too. By the end of this clinical psychology podcast episode, you’ll know some of the negative mental health consequences of sexual violence, how sexual violence can destroy lives and how people can deal with sexual trauma. This is a great, deeply personal episode that you’re going to learn a lot from. Today’s psychology podcast episode has been sponsored by Applied Psychology: Applying Social Psychology, Cognitive Psychology and More To The Real World. Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Note: whilst this psychology podcast episode will talk about rape and other forms of sexual violence, I will not include any graphic details about what happened to me during my attack. One-Year Anniversary Of My Rape On the 13th April 2024, I was raped and as much as I know some people will call me a liar because of the societal myth that people Assigned Male at Birth never get raped and they are always the rapists. That is a lie and I have done a lot of research over the past year about the truth behind sexual violence, and how and why men and women can be both the sexual predator and the survivor. Hence, I am just going to be honest and tell you about my experience and if people call me a liar or a fake just seeking attention then so be it. I’ve been called it all over the past year so it won’t be anything new to me. Therefore, on the 13th April 2024, I was raped in a hookup that went very wrong. After a lifetime of being abused, hated and never being accepted for being gay, and with my friends all in happy relationships where they could do whatever they wanted without the fear of death and being beaten. I just wanted a single night of being gay, a single night where I could experience something that was perfectly natural and normal for other people, and a single night where I could be free. It really didn’t work out like that at all so I was raped. Contrast to all the myths and lies about sexual violence, I didn’t scream, fight back or try to stop him. I simply went into survival mode and I fawned because I didn’t want to make him angry, I didn’t want him to hurt me anymore than he was already and I wanted to escape as soon as possible. I survived.   I was in denial for two days about what had happened to me because I thought that was simply how sex worked. Then as more and more trauma responses manifested themselves, I realised I was raped and then everything happened. I developed Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder along with intense social anxiety so I couldn’t really go out by myself because I was so anxious and terrified of being raped again. And I have discussed a lot of what happened to me over the next seven-months in different episodes of The Psychology World Podcast. Now I want to focus on the lows and the lessons learnt before wrapping up with the highs of the past year along with a few final lessons. The Lows of The Past Year After Being Raped The Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder There have been a lot of different factors and mental health consequences that have not been fun in the past year. I think the worse because it encompasses so many different facets of my mental health was the Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. That was seriously horrible to experience because the majority of people think it is just soldiers who can experience PTSD. Yet I did because whenever a rape memory was triggered or I was reminded of my rape whether this was through something I saw, something I hear or an intrusive thought or flashback. I had severe trauma reactions. I would literally run away at times. I would get so fearful and scared that I was going to die, be raped or get beaten. Or I would go into survival mode and once I was safe, I would have a full-on breakdown because it was simply too much for me. One of my triggers was seeing fat men, and I don’t say that to be fatphobic but because my rapist was a fat man. I couldn’t actually stand to be in the same room as a fat man because it would cause me to have a breakdown and enter fight-or-flight mode. The same went for hearing or thinking about the name of my rapist or experiencing any sort of sexual or romantic attraction. Which was really tragic because when I thought a guy was cute or attractive after my rape, I would have an extreme trauma reaction. That was really horrible, because I was raped in April and then it was summer, and I won’t deny that I like summer because men can look very hot in shorts and t-shirts. Sleep was another major issue because of rape dreams. There wasn’t a single night for the first six months or more when I didn’t have a rape-related dream. It wasn’t even related to what actually happened, it was just how my mind twisted everything. I had dreams about my rapist killing me, my friends raping me, people I had only seen briefly at social events raping and beating and killing me. The First Lessons: Rape Has No End of Impacts, Need for Processing Trauma and Self-Compassion On the whole, there were other aspects of the PTSD that I flat out hated, like the intense social anxiety and the depression that I’ve spoken about before on the podcast. Yet the stark impact that sexual violence has on a person was unreal and I couldn’t believe how many different ways it impacts you. From my work to my friendships to my ability to go outside and everything else, my rape and my mental health impacted so much of it. As a result, this massive negative aspect of 2024 where the entire year was basically taken up me healing from my rape and recovering from sexual trauma. This aspect taught me the importance of having good friends and a good social support network, as well as never underestimating the power of trauma. In one of my books coming out in the next few years, I include the line “if you don’t deal with your trauma, your trauma will deal with you,” and that is so true. You need to keep healing and processing what happened to you otherwise your trauma will make you process what happened to you in the worse ways possible. As well as this low taught me the important of self-compassion too, which has become an important part of my life now. I used to beat myself up so often for my mental health, for feeling so depressed and anxious and having such severe trauma responses that I couldn’t do anything for days or months at a time. I essentially didn’t have a life in 2024. And that made me feel even worse about myself, my life and my mental health. Thankfully learning self-compassion helped me deal with those negative self-critical thoughts. I still use all of these important lessons in my life nowadays to help my mental health whenever it dips. Self- Blame and People Who Know Less Judging Me A second major low of the past year was that at first I didn’t blame myself for my rape because it wasn’t my fault. Rape and other forms of sexual violence is never the survivor’s fault because there was nothing they could have done to prevent it. That is the simple truth of it. However, when I started reading things online, seeing how certain people who were very dear to me started blaming me, judging me and making me feel awful for what some rapist had done to me. That only made my mental health worse. For example, two people very close to me who were meant to love me no matter what couldn’t handle the fact that I was raped. So they blamed me, they wouldn’t allow me to call it rape, they wouldn’t allow me to talk about it and they were very firm that it was my fault. I shouldn’t have done it and I shouldn’t have been gay. And as whilst researching rape and sexual trauma more and more was very healing for me because it allowed me to see everything I was going through was normal. It reminded me of the world I actually lived in and how society saw people like me. It reminded me that sexual violence is extremely common, society always blames the survivor and the world is always against the survivor because of lies, myths and misconceptions. And the extreme rare cases of false allegations of rape don’t help matters. Therefore, as I was exposed to those societal judgements and certain people in my life judging me and blaming me for being raped, my mental health only declined. And what really annoyed me about these people was that I am unfortunately an expert by experience when it comes to rape. I was raped. These people were not, and yet because of their egos, and what they’ve seen on the news. They believe it is their God-given right to tell me, the rape survivor, how I am meant to be feeling, how I am meant to be behaving and how I am not meant to be getting raped. It is outrageous and disgusting that people think they know better than rape survivors. Second Lesson: You Learn Who Your Friends Are After Rape The second major lesson I’ve learnt in the past year is that after being raped, you really learn who your friends are. You learn who you can rely on, who you can’t and how people can deal with certain news. My best friend could certainly handle the news about my rape and they were great to me for the longest of times and I will always be extremely grateful for everything they did for me. Yet honestly, because of my disorganised attachment and their avoidant attachment styles and other traits about my best friend, we both turned the friendship very toxic and our friendship has never really recovered from my rape trauma and everything we accidentally did to each other during that time. There have been friends who I’ve told and they act like it never happened and they let me talk about it whereas others let me talk about it but they don’t know what to say at all. I don’t blame them at all because rape is awful and it is hard to know what to say. As a result, in the past year, I really have learnt the different levels of friendship that you can have with people, what you can and what you cannot say to others and I have just learnt a lot about attachment and friendships in the last year. At the time of writing actually, I’m doing a lot of work on my own disorganised attachment style because even though I am making great progress, I want to deal with it as much as I can so it doesn’t harm any more of my friendships and relationships. Self-Harm and Suicidality This is probably the lowest part of the past 365 days because I self-harmed a lot in the past year. I haven’t self-harmed since the 30th December because I can deal with a lot more things than I could previously and I really have worked hard to deal with whatever happens. Including learning that certain people who I’m close to where having sex. Again, even thinking or learning about sex was a major trigger for me up until recently. Even though a year later, sexual contact is still to much of a trigger at the moment for me. I think I self-harmed because I wanted to punish myself for being raped. A lot of important people in my life were telling me that it was my fault, that I should have done things differently and I interpreted certain things that being my fault. For example, I remember last June I was driving to the university in the evening for a social event and I parked my car, it was a beautiful evening and I was listening to the radio. And I listened to a news report about a cop congratulating a rape survivor for coming forward because they were able to arrest the rapist because of it. I cried so hard, and self-harmed in the end of it. For me, because other people had already told me that I was a failure for not reporting it, for not going to the police and a whole bunch of other factors. I felt that I needed to be punished and control was another factor too. I self-harmed because I wanted to be in control and feel something instead of depression, anxiety and other trauma responses. And as my mental health continued to decline, I went to kill myself three times. I won’t explain how but I tried to kill myself three times and this was how I learnt how strained my relationship with my best friend became. They were so badly hurt, in so much pain and I later learnt that this is the point where they started having panic attacks over me because they really didn’t want me to die. I really did destroy our friendship with these suicidal attempts. However, contrast to popular myths and lies, I didn’t want to do suicide because I wanted to. I tried to kill myself because I didn’t think there was another way out. My quality of life was so low and I couldn’t go outside, I couldn’t do anything with my life and my mental health was so bad that I couldn’t do anything I enjoyed. I doubted I could ever form a good relationship, I doubted I could ever have sex and so many other factors. I just couldn’t see another way out and I suppose I knew that it would hurt my friends and my housemates. Yet I just didn’t want to be in pain anymore. I wanted it all to end. Third Lesson: Life Actually Does Get Better There have been other lows in the past year, like my anorexia, but I’ll talk about them in one of the books that are coming out in the next few years. As a result, in the past year, I have learnt that life really does get better in the end. It will take a while, believe me, it seriously will take so much longer than you want. Nonetheless, your life will get better overtime. It will be small changes at first and you will be able to do more and more over time, and it will never seem enough. You will be angry, upset and depressed that you cannot just magically bounce back from your sexual trauma, but you will get there. If you keep putting in the therapy work, if you keep healing and if you intend to survive this, then you will in the end. And now as I transition onto the highs, I am really looking forward to sharing with you the positives of the past year since I was raped. The Highs Of One-Year On From Being Raped Becoming An Expert By Experience I fully understand that this is a very, very weird benefit of the past year but as an aspiring clinical psychologist, honestly I am glad to have the mental health and counselling experiences that I have. Now I understand what it’s like to have PTSD, to have intense social anxiety and to have major depression. Of course, everyone’s experience is slightly different but I can now understand and empathise with future clients because I vaguely know what hell they are going through because I have lived through it too. I am grateful to know how to survive these awful mental health experiences and I am really happy that I went through specialist rape counselling, and my anorexia counselling. I have learnt so much about myself, self-soothing and trauma recovery because of my two excellent counsellors. I have had such lovely and powerful conversations with both of them and I have learnt tips and tricks and techniques that I can now use with future clients once I’m qualified. Without my rape, I never would have learnt those things. Of course, I am not saying I am grateful to be raped. I will never be grateful to having gone through that but I could look back on the past 365 days with hatred, bitterness and I could not focus on any positives. Yet that isn’t actually healthy. Still, grieve for everything that you have lost, been through and allow yourself to feel all the painful emotions that you’re experiencing. Yet as part of positive psychology and compassion for ourselves and others, we should try to focus on the positives. It is actually a great way in my personal experiences to push away suicidal thoughts. Even on the really, really bad days if you can name three or five positive things that happened then you really do start to feel better. It’s a simple but very powerful technique. So the past year has taught me a lot of valuable techniques, life experiences and mental health experiences that will serve me in the future. It means I can relate to clients more, come to clinical work with a unique insight and it gives me more experiences to draw on when I’m writing these podcast episodes. I am a survivor, not a victim. Healing, Healing and More Healing The penultimate high is a great benefit of the past year because I am finally healed from all sorts of different traumas that have happened to me in my life. I explain more about this in my upcoming book Healing As A Survivor  but the vast majority of my rape trauma responses were actually just heightened trauma responses that I got from my childhood because of my child abuse. I was able to deal with all of that and I was able to learn from healthy boundaries and how to be empowered for the first person in my life. I flat out loved resetting my boundaries and resetting my relationships so many people, because I am not perfect at it. Yet I want to stop the harmful, toxic relationships that have ruled my life for so many years and I am already reaping the benefits. Furthermore, I’m healing in terms of my anorexia too. My rape really did refuel my anorexia to new levels and I was losing a kilogram a week for months, I was making myself really ill and fatigued all the time. My health wasn’t the best because of the condition, but in the past year, I’ve healed more because I’ve targeted my anorexia. Sure I still have anorexia because you can’t eliminated mental health conditions, but I know how to cope with my sense of control, strong emotions and my anorexic thoughts. I’ll continue to have flare-ups in the future, but I seriously doubt my anorexia will ever get bad again. I know how to manage it and because I know who I am, what my values are and everything that anorexia threatens. I really don’t want my anorexia to return. At the end of this psychology podcast episode, I’ll share one of my favourite quotes of all time with you because it hits this topic right on the head. New Friendships and I Had A Partner In the past year, some of the highs have definitely included the new friendships I’ve made along the way. A good few of them haven’t lasted because of my mental health, my disorganised attachment and a few factors related to the people themselves. Yet I’ve still really enjoyed making those friendships because they were all great people and I honestly wish them all the best with the future. Equally, now I have my friends who I spent almost every Saturday with playing board games and/ or Dungeons and Dragons or another RPG system with. It was only yesterday I met up with three of them and we played board games outside in the sun for a few hours before moving inside to play for another four-ish hours before we went to dinner at Wetherspoons in Canterbury. I really enjoy hanging out with my friends on Saturdays because I never would have met or become friends with them otherwise. I have a lot of fun with them, we always have great conversations and it’s how I met my partner. Which is certainly something I never expected. After I was raped, given all my mental health struggles, how bad I was at social relationships and my low self-esteem, I never expected to have a relationship for 6-weeks. 6-weeks full of laughter, fun and just enjoying being someone’s partner. I had my first kisses, I held someone’s hand in public for the first time and I was just able to do things that I had never done before, and things that I never would have dreamed of a few years ago because I would have been too terrified because of trauma. We even both stayed up until 4:15 in the morning one day just talking and hanging out and cuddling. I really enjoyed that relationship more than I wanted to admit, even though it was casual and I was able to do casual. We didn’t even break-up after 6-weeks because we weren’t into each other. We broke up because making out with my partner brought up a lot of trauma for me, and my partner had been repeatedly assaulted in their last relationship so they were struggling too at times and they weren’t in a good place themselves. My partner agreed if they were in a better place they would want something deeper, committed and longer-term with me. And ever since we got together, they kept saying how they didn’t want to hurt me. It was sweet. There’s a lot more to it than that but considering this a public podcast that is all I’m going to say. However, I still really enjoyed it and after I was raped, I never ever imagined forming new friendships, certainly not playing dungeons and dragons for hours upon hours with them, and I truly never imagined someone as beautiful as my partner would say yes to me. There really is always hope. It doesn’t matter if you were raped, it doesn’t matter how much trauma you’ve been through, it doesn’t matter how dark you think the world is. There is hope that great, wonderful things can happen to you in the end. It may take far longer than you imagine, or it might take no time at all, but it can happen in the end. Brief Guide To Actions We Can Take To End Sexual Violence In the future, I have another episode on the actions we can take to end sexual violence once and for all because it is possible. Yet I want to briefly mention three things we can do at the end of this podcast episode to work towards ending sexual violence. You Need To Learn About Sexual Violence And Share It With Others I know I’m preaching to the converted here but if we’re going to end sexual violence then you need to learn about it, what it is and the truth behind sexual violence. In other words, you need to overcome all the myths and misconceptions that we’ve created for ourselves in society, because these myths are harmful and extremely common. Therefore, it’s good to know that online resources, like this podcast, have made it easier than ever before to get accurate information about sexual violence as well as how common it is within our communities and how it devastates lives. Knowledge is power against sexual violence, so please, make sure you read about it and learn about sexual violence. The next step is sharing what you’ve learnt with other people. You Can Advocate For Youth Prevention Programs  As I’ve spoken about before on the podcast, the majority of perpetrators of sexual violence are teenagers and young adults. Therefore, if we’re going to stop sexual violence then we need to give young people the knowledge and tools for healthy relationships. This includes tools to help them understand consent and to help them have a healthy sexuality. Thankfully, over the years, there has been a lot of work done on the development of youth prevention programs to help give young people the tools to have healthy relationships without them believing they have to commit sexual violence. You Can Identify Organisations And People Working With Sexual Assault Survivors In Your Community And Connect With Them To help take action against sexual violence within your community, you can see who’s doing prevention and response work in the local area. For example, this can include a family justice centre, a rape crisis centre and local political groups in charge of legislating against sexual violence. This can be a powerful way to take action to end sexual assault because by reaching out to these organisations and people you can get involved in their networks and be an active member of them so you can use your interests, skills and abilities to support them. For instance, if you identify a gap in their resources, like there being no way for people to donate to the local cause, then you could help them fill that gap in the community’s network. Clinical Psychology Conclusion In all honesty, I probably haven’t scratched the surface of all the highs and lows from the past 365 days. For instance, I haven’t mentioned all the good things about university, my transgender mental health studies, my Outreach work, my family, my new Irish citizenship and more. Yet that’s a good thing. The past year has been hellish. I don’t wish my past year on anyone because of everything in my life that has fallen apart, been smashed and annihilated and everything I have had to go through and do just to survive. No one should ever have to go through it. No one should ever have to go through the Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, the rough and eye-opening experience of learning who your friends actually are in your darkest moments, and the self-harm and suicide. No one should have to go through that. However, me and so many other amazing, bright people survived our trauma. There were great benefits of the past year too and 2024 will be extremely transformative for me in some bad ways but a lot of good ways too. The past 365 days have allowed me to reset my relationships and actually learn who I am through doing a lot of healing, it has given me some great real world experience about mental health difficulties and how to cope with their maladaptive effects, and I’ve forged some great friendships. I had a beautiful partner for 6-weeks, and we might not be together anymore. Yet my partner’s still happy to kiss, hold hands and hang out, so I’m happy. I can still experience stuff for the first time in my life. Ultimately, I want to end this podcast episode by saying, if you’re an aspiring or qualified psychologist or a psychology student. There will be times when you meet a client who has experienced a type of trauma, be it sexual trauma or not. The past year has also taught me how outrageously high the number of sexual trauma incidents are, and when this happens in your clinical work. It is important that you remember it is possible to survive and you believe it yourself. My anorexia counsellor and my old private counsellor who I forgot to mention earlier, they have no training and no real awareness about sexual violence. Yet there were still great things they did to help me and just help me through my time. The best result is always to refer rape survivors to rape crisis centres because East Kent Rape Crisis Centre is flat out amazing and they helped me to save myself. However, aspiring and qualified psychologists should get some awareness in psychological trauma and stabilisation. You will come across a client with trauma one day and trauma is specialist work but you can help the client more than you possibly know. And finally, if you’re a survivor, then please keep going, keep fighting, keep working towards healing. It will be painful, it will be slow and there will be days when you want to die because it seems so much easier. Please don’t though. If I had managed to kill myself any one of those three times, I wouldn’t be here right now talking to you wonderful people. I wouldn’t be able to share my experience, I wouldn’t be able to learn all the great things that I flat out love, and I wouldn’t be able to write, read fiction and do all the other thousands of things that make me happy. And I wouldn’t have been able to meet my partner, have my first kiss and just be with someone. We’re still friends now and I’ve cried a lot over that relationship because I hate that someone raped and assaulted my partner who is such a lovely and caring person. Sexual violence has to end and it will one day. “As long as I have my unshakable self, I can dig in with both feet with all my might. As long as I know who I am, all my doubts, hesitations and frustrations will disappear. And no demon on earth can escape my descending blade," -Tokito, Demon Slayer anime Season 4 If you think about that quote from a mental health perspective then you’ll realise why that is my favourite quote of all time. Just keep going yourself and remember it gets better in the end.     I really hope you enjoyed today’s clinical psychology podcast episode. If you want to learn more, please check out: FREE 8 PSYCHOLOGY BOOK BOXSET Applied Psychology: Applying Social Psychology, Cognitive Psychology and More To The Real World. Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Patreon for exclusive access and rewards Have a great day. Forensic Psychology References and Further Reading What To Do When Depression Makes it Impossible to get out of bed? What is window of tolerance? What’s it like to experience a major depressive episode? What is Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder? Why An Erection Isn’t Consent? Armatta, J. (2018). Ending sexual violence through transformative justice. Interdisciplinary Journal of Partnership Studies, 5(1), 4-4. https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/awareness-action/202203/3-ways-take-action-end-sexual-assault Kirby, P. (2015). Ending sexual violence in conflict: the Preventing Sexual Violence Initiative and its critics. International Affairs, 91(3), 457-472. Tutchell, E., & Edmonds, J. (2020). Unsafe spaces: Ending sexual abuse in universities. Emerald Publishing Limited. Wessells, M. G., & Kostelny, K. (2021). Understanding and ending violence against children: A holistic approach. Peace and Conflict: Journal of Peace Psychology, 27(1), 3. Wright, H. (2015). Ending Sexual Violence and the War System–Or Militarizing Feminism?. International Feminist Journal of Politics, 17(3), 503-507. I truly hope that you’ve enjoyed this blog post and if you feel like supporting the blog on an ongoing basis and get lots of rewards, then please head to my Patreon  page. However, if want to show one-time support and appreciation, the place to do that is PayPal. If you do that, please include your email address in the notes section, so I can say thank you. Which I am going to say right now. Thank you! Click  https://www.buymeacoffee.com/connorwhiteley  for a one-time bit of support.

After something personal happened last night, all I can think about today is trauma and considering this psychology podcast episode is already likely to be late going out, I didn’t want to argue with myself. I just wanted to do an episode on something I was already thinking about because what we experience in our childhood can have a massive impact on our relationships. For example, what we  think a healthy relationship and boundaries look like and how we believe the social world works. Therefore, in this clinical psychology podcast episode, you’ll learn about how childhood trauma impacts relationships, how trauma survivors can improve their relationship boundaries and a lot more useful and insightful information. If you enjoy learning about mental health, trauma outcomes and a bit of social psychology then this is a great episode for you. Today’s psychology podcast episode has been sponsored by Developmental Psychology: A Guide To Developmental and Child Psychology . Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. How Does Trauma Impact Relationships? Not a single one of us is born with an innate understanding of healthy boundaries. We learn what boundaries are healthy and what isn’t healthy in a relationship by trying out different things, learning about social relationships and unfortunately, getting hurt along the way. All of us go through life thinking we know what healthy boundaries are until one day or one moment, we realise what we thought was a healthy boundary actually isn’t. For example, you might have a fight with your best friend and it doesn’t go the way you expected and you or your friend is hurt. Equally, you might find relationships really overwhelming and other people might believe that you’re simply too “sensitive”. Finally, and this happens to me somewhat often, you find out that you aren’t actually as close to someone as you thought and you start to feel like an outsider. Personally, I’ll be the first to say that I find interpersonal relationships quite overwhelming at times because of my disorganised attachment style that I’m working on. As well as having childhood trauma and autism makes it difficult to do the entire social relationship part anyway, especially with neurotypical people who don’t exactly have the same communication style as me. I have no problem talking with anyone and I love forming those relationships, but honestly, it is hard for me to form deep and meaningful friendships and relationships. Boundaries are sometimes a major problem for me because I don’t understand them. Also, I didn’t really have great role models in my life to model these behaviours from. On the whole, we all learn in the end that boundaries are a fine balance between feeling safe and vulnerable in a relationship where we can share our authentic emotions whilst asserting our personal limits and needs with other people when we feel we need their support. However, when childhood trauma is added into the mix, this adds additional layers of complexity into trying to understand what healthy boundaries in relationships are, because of their traumatic experiences. How Does Childhood Trauma Affect Relationship Boundaries? Unlike when adults experience trauma and their perception of healthy boundaries aren’t always affected, children who experience trauma are different. Since children living in dangerous, neglectful or abusive situations nearly always have their sense of boundaries negatively impacted because they have to depend on untrustworthy adults just to survive. These children don’t have any choice and as part of this survival process, a child’s brain has to do some very intense work. Especially as, Jannia Fisher (a trauma specialist) explains in her book Healing The Fragmented Selves of Trauma Survivors: “When attachment figures are abusive, the child’s only source of safety and protection becomes simultaneously the source of immediate danger, leaving the child caught between two conflicting sets of instincts. On the one hand, they are driven by the attachment instinct to seek proximity, comfort, and protection from attachment figures. On the other hand, they are driven by equally strong animal defense instincts to freeze, fight, flee or submit…before they get too close to the frightening parent.” (Fisher, 2017 p. 24) In other words, as much as a child knows their caregiver is abusive or being neglectful, the child still wants to form an attachment and bond with them because the child innately knows they need the adult in order to survive. Yet as the child tries to do this more and more, they experience a powerful and (I would say) almost horrific stress reaction that signals to their nervous system that a threat to their very survival is incoming so their body gets into fight-or-flight mode constantly. To the child this means they learn very quickly that relationships are helpful because they are key to survival, but relationships are dangerous too. Therefore, the child adapts their perception of boundaries to fit this really weird paradox. At the moment, I’m doing a lot of research and writing regarding attachment styles so this is really clear and tragic to read about in a trauma context. Personally, I would love to say that this is wrong but it isn’t. Based on my own experiences of having a very homophobic social environment and a lot of other things going on in other social situations. It’s hard. You don’t know what’s safe, who to trust and you are always on edge just waiting for something bad to happen. It’s horrible and over time, you can convince yourself that it is simply safer to be alone because if you don’t let anyone in then no one can hurt you anymore. Of course, your life gets really alone, isolated and awful if you continue that pattern of behaviour for too long. In addition, I know we’ve never looked at Schema Therapy on the podcast before but within this form of psychotherapy, there are “mistrust/ abuse schemas” which can leave a person with more tolerance for being mistreated and have weaker boundaries. All because the person doesn’t know any different. Making it quite the powerful revelation when the person realises that healthier boundaries are actually possible. As a result, when a child makes a connection between their abuse or neglect that causes a traumatic stress response from their brain, so they either fight, flight, freeze or attach or feign with their attachment style or sense of boundaries. This leads to five different effects on the child’s boundary style and as an aspiring or qualified psychologist it’s important to understand these boundary styles so our approach to mental health work can be more trauma informed. Ultimately, helping us to support our clients feel safer and more in control in their relationships. What Are The Five Boundary Styles? As I mentioned in the last section, our mind and body have five reactions to trauma that impact how we perceive healthy relationship patterns. For example, firstly, there is the “fight” reaction where we believe we need to push our needs onto others, impose our own version of events or even attack other people if we think that it’s necessary to preserve our urgent needs. This can lead to someone becoming self-absorbed in a relationship. Secondly, you could react with a “flight” response where your childhood trauma has caused you to have anxiety around closeness and intimacy where you always find reasons to avoid getting too close or directly expressing an emotional need. This can lead to social and emotional isolation. In my opinion, this second point definitely fits me because it’s clear I have an anxious attachment style because I get stressed in close relationships. I find them scary and I get concerned about getting close to someone because I’m always scared they’re going to abandon me like everyone else in my life. Thankfully, this is something I’m actively working on and I recently learnt I have disorganised attachment as my main form of attachment too. Thirdly, there is the “freeze” reaction where a client might passively detach themselves or zone out from a situation and find ways to avoid conflict. This leads the client to being impulsive, procrastinate and experience self-alienation. Penultimately, a client might have an “attach” reaction where they are overwhelmed with a strong, painful need to be close to others but they’re always stuck feeling lonely, sad and other people might call them emotionally needy and desperate. This is something I can partly relate too as part of my attachment style because when I do find someone I want to be close to, and this is even more true when I’m struggling myself. Yet I used to get as close as possible to someone and I didn’t want to be lonely and I did come across as emotionally needy. Finally, a client might have a “feign or submit” reaction to other people where they only think about the other person’s needs so they degrade or they become blind to their own needs. Or they feel guilty or criticise themselves for having needs of their own. I won’t say too much because as someone who regularly interacts with someone who fits this description. I understand that it’s a trauma response and it is just something that they have learnt, but it is hurtful and almost “annoying” to see someone not recognise this when they’re calling you out for your own attachment and boundary issues. Since when someone with a “feign or submit” reaction does recognise their own needs and they stop supporting the other person without warning because they didn’t realise how much they were degrading their needs. It’s hurtful and it really sucks. How To Cope With Boundary Styles Using Positive Self-Talk? As a result if we’re ever working with a client who might fall into one of these five reactions, even though they are likely to have a single main or dominant reaction but still dip into the other types of boundary styles depending on the situation. It’s important that we help clients to learn how best to cope with their boundary styles, in addition to any trauma work that needs to be done. Therefore, there are three things that clients can do to help themselves with their boundary style. Firstly, they can use journaling with a sense of curiosity and control as a way to track their relationship patterns. I’ll be the first to admit that you will be blind to your relationship patterns because they are so normal for you and you don’t know anything else. As well as you often only realise that you have unhealthy relationship patterns because someone has pointed it out to you. Yet if a client doesn’t have access to someone who will point it out to them, they can use journaling to identify their feelings around staying present with emotions in relationships. And clients could explore what not submitting or feigning would be like for them. Also, they could explore the thoughts and feelings that going against their boundary style brings up. So the client can ultimately find out what they are most afraid of when it comes to changing up their boundary style. Secondly, it’s critical that clients learn to trust their body. This was a major part of my sexual trauma counselling because your body, your senses and your nervous system are a brilliant tool to help you survive and it picks up on so much more information than you even realise. Yet your body is the first thing that will tell you when your boundary style is being triggered so you can trust your body and learn from it. For example, if you enter a certain situation and you start feeling dread, anxious and like you’re going to get shouted at or punished. Then notice these signs and figure out where you learnt them based on your trauma. Then you can identify areas to work on. For me, at times my boundary styles can be triggered when I get close to people because I’m scared they’re going to hurt me, betray me and I’m going to lose everything again like I have in the past. I never want to go through all that pain, suffering and conflict ever again. Finally, clients can use self-talk to cope with their boundary style because after a client has noticed and identified their triggers. They can start talking to themselves and instead of being your scared traumatised child self, they can show themselves compassion, love and attention as an adult that the client might never have received as a child. Internal Family System Therapy is essentially built around this idea and I have some experience with a few techniques from this therapy because of my private counselling in 2023. I found it really helpful. Clinical Psychology Conclusion On the whole, when it comes to childhood trauma, or as I found out last night all forms of trauma, it will affect you in a million different ways. It will affect you from your relationships, your attachment styles, how you relate to others, your mental health, perhaps your ability to work and so many more areas. However, just because childhood trauma causes you or your client to have a certain boundary style, doesn’t mean you’re messed up, you’re doomed or you can’t change. The traumatised part of yourself is still inside you, it will be scared of being close to others because you don’t want to risk going through your childhood again. I understand that, and that’s okay. It really is. Nonetheless, you’re an adult now. You don’t need to depend on neglectful or abusive adults anymore, and what you really need, what that child part of you really needs, is for you to compassionately care for that child part. Provide it with the love, comfort and reassurance that you probably never received as a child. Once you realise this you can and probably should work on it in therapy with a trained trauma informed mental health professional. They can help you work through your trauma and most importantly, how to safely manage your relationship boundaries so you can grow and thrive instead of just survive. Here are some questions at the end of this psychology podcast episode: ·       Have you ever experienced childhood trauma? ·       Do you or anyone you know fit into one of these boundary styles? ·       How could you identify any triggers or situations that activate your boundary styles? ·       Could you find a mental health professional to help you work through this?     I hope you enjoyed today’s developmental psychology podcast episode. If you want to learn more, please check out: FREE 8 PSYCHOLOGY BOOK BOXSET Developmental Psychology: A Guide To Developmental and Child Psychology . Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Patreon for exclusive access and rewards Have a great day. Child Psychology References and Further Reading Erozkan, A. (2016). The Link between Types of Attachment and Childhood Trauma. Universal journal of educational research, 4(5), 1071-1079. Fisher, Janina (2017) Healing the Fragmented Selves of Trauma Survivors: Overcoming Internal Self-Alienation. Routledge. Fuchshuber, J., Hiebler-Ragger, M., Kresse, A., Kapfhammer, H. P., & Unterrainer, H. F. (2019). The influence of attachment styles and personality organization on emotional functioning after childhood trauma. Frontiers in psychiatry, 10, 643. MacDonald, K., Sciolla, A. F., Folsom, D., Bazzo, D., Searles, C., Moutier, C., ... & Norcross, B. (2015). Individual risk factors for physician boundary violations: The role of attachment style, childhood trauma and maladaptive beliefs. General Hospital Psychiatry, 37(5), 489-496. Skinner-Osei, P., & Levenson, J. S. (2018). Trauma-informed services for children with incarcerated parents. Journal of Family Social Work, 21(4-5), 421-437. Valeras, A. B., Cobb, E., Prodger, M., Hochberg, E., Allosso, L., & VandenHazel, H. (2019). Addressing adults with adverse childhood experiences requires a team approach. The International Journal of Psychiatry in Medicine, 54(4-5), 352-360. Walker, Pete (2013) Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving: A Guide and Map for Recovering from Childhood Trauma. CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform. Yilmaz, H., Arslan, C., & Arslan, E. (2022). The effect of traumatic experiences on attachment styles. Anales de Psicología/Annals of Psychology, 38(3), 489-498. I truly hope that you’ve enjoyed this blog post and if you feel like supporting the blog on an ongoing basis and get lots of rewards, then please head to my Patreon  page. However, if want to show one-time support and appreciation, the place to do that is PayPal. If you do that, please include your email address in the notes section, so I can say thank you. Which I am going to say right now. Thank you! Click  https://www.buymeacoffee.com/connorwhiteley  for a one-time bit of support.

With depression being one of the most common mental health conditions in the world, a lot of a clinical psychologist’s workload will be supporting people with depression. A common depression symptom is what’s known as “Leaden Paralysis” and one of the effects of the symptoms is that everyday tasks take a million times more energy to complete. This can make the “simple” task of getting out of bed feel impossible for people with depression. Therefore, in this clinical psychology podcast episode, you’ll learn what is leaden paralysis, why leaden paralysis impacts people’s mental health and what to do when depression makes it impossible to get out of bed. If you enjoy learning about mental health, Major Depressive Disorder and psychotherapy then this will be a great episode for you. Today’s psychology podcast episode is sponsored by CBT For Depression: A Clinical Psychology Introduction To Cognitive Behavioural Therapy For Depression . Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Note: nothing on this podcast is ever any sort of official medical, mental health, relationship or any other form of advice. What is The Weight of Depression? If you’ve ever experienced depression then you might be aware that there are some days where your depression will weigh you down so much that it feels like your body is made of lead and concrete. This makes the very notion of doing anything, much less leave your bed feel flat out impossible. As well as the sheer weight of depression might make you cancel plans, spend more time at home and/ or you might miss or be late for work. This weight of depression and a struggle to get out of bed can take a massive toll on your work, relationships and your quality of life. Personally, during August until October 2024 when I had quite severe depression, it always took me about two hours to get out of bed in the morning. Getting out of bed just felt hard because I had fun things to do, I could see my friends and everything but it wasn’t good enough motivation to actually want to get out of bed. I just wanted the day to be over so I could sleep and I didn’t have to deal with all the trauma responses that I was having every single hour of every single day. What Is Leaden Paralysis? As a result, there is a symptom of depression called “leaden paralysis” that causes people with depression to experience a severe drop in energy and as Qi et al. (2020) highlights this makes everyday tasks a million times harder for the individual. This is important to bear in mind because a lot of people who have never experienced depression or severe depression before might argue that people should just get up. Yet it isn’t that easy. And this is one of the reasons why depression is a leading cause of disability round the world (Friedrich, 2017). One of the clearest examples for me of leaden paralysis was on the very first day of my severe depression when it took me 5 hours just to have a shower. After struggling to get up for two or three hours, I managed to eventually make breakfast and at midday I decided to try to have a shower. Yet everything felt so heavy, I was so drained, I had no energy and my body might as well have had 20kg kettlebells tied to it. It took so long to go through the living room, up the stairs, grab my towel and clothes, go across the landing, go into the bathroom, undressed, etc, etc. Every one of those steps felt so impossible and each one took so long. That is what leaden paralysis is like and that’s why supporting people with depression is so important. You can probably imagine but having leaden paralysis doesn’t make you feel great and it can make you feel even worse about yourself as your quality of life starts to crumble, so this is why mental health support is critical. What To Do When Depression Makes It Impossible To Get Out Of Bed? Here are three strategies to help people with depression overcome leaden paralysis and get out of bed in the mornings. Firstly, you can break the day down into “hoops”. This strategy involves breaking down your day into sections then you visualise these tasks as hoops. For example, getting up or brushing your teeth can be seen as two hoops that need to be conquered. After completing each task, you could imagine yourself jumping through each hoop and this can be an encouraging visual so you get a sense of achievement, and it helps to make the day less overwhelming. As well as on the really difficult days, seeing tasks as hoops can help you determine what tasks or hoops can be done on other days. Secondly, you need to try to be kind to yourself because one of the ways how depression impacts us is makes us criticise ourselves more often. Therefore, to define your depression and how it criticizes you every chance it gets, you might want to practise self-kindness by using compassionate words when you realise your self-dialogue is getting more negative and harsher. For example, today is actually a good example for me because my mental health definitely dipped today, and I was tired, overwhelmed and I was anxious about seeing my partner tomorrow because of trauma responses. My partner has done nothing wrong by the way. This meant I didn’t get up for over an hour this morning and when I had a nap in the late afternoon in an effort to make myself feel better, I napped for 40 minutes but I didn’t get out of bed for another two hours. At first I was judging myself harshly because that was such a waste of time, I had so much to do and on and on and on. But I realised that it’s okay I couldn’t get out of bed earlier because this is what happens when my mental health dips. I need to listen to myself, figure out what’s causing my mental health to dip and just keep going. Things will get better later on or tomorrow and as long as I focus on just going forward then that’s okay. As well as I am hardly alone because this happens to everyone at different times in their life, even more so when you have depression and other mental health difficulties. This is what works for me, you might need other self-compassionate and self-kindness thoughts. The key is to not feed into your depression by criticising and hating yourself because you can’t get out of bed. This will only make it feel even harder to do everyday tasks. Finally, reach out for mental health support, because if you’re experiencing depression that is so severe you find it really difficult to get out of bed. It is important that you seek mental health support as soon as possible because if you don’t get support then your symptoms might get worse and your risk of suicide and self-harm increase. I really don’t want that for you. As well as your depression might make you want to be alone and isolate yourself, but when you’re struggling, it is a really good idea to be surrounded by other people. These people can include friends and family, but make sure you reach out to mental health professionals like a therapist or a mental health helpline too. Since if you isolate yourself then you might quickly find yourself in an echo chamber surrounded by your negative thoughts and inactivity and this will only maintain your depression. And make you feel worse and worse until you don’t see another way out. Whenever I go through depression and mental health difficulties, reaching out to mental health support is always the best thing I could have done. It is always nerve-racking, I try to put it off as long as possible and I try to deal with things on my own at first. Yet ultimately seeing a counsellor, therapist or another form of mental health support is always best and I grow and develop so much and I flat out love the process too. Clinical Psychology Conclusion Whether you’re a aspiring or qualified psychologist or person with depression, we’ve learnt a lot during today’s psychology podcast episode. For psychologists, a lot of our future work will be with people with depression and we will encounter leaden paralysis the majority of the time because it is a common symptom. I know as someone who has experienced the inability to get out of bed frequently in the past, this is very distressing, it makes you feel awful about yourself and it can play into suicidal thoughts. Especially, when every single other everyday task seems to require so much effort that your quality of life just crumbles and is reduced to nothing. This is why learning about strategies to support clients with leaden paralysis is so important. For people with depression, I hope you now have some strategies to help you get out of bed in the morning and I hope you realise that you aren’t alone. What you’re experiencing is normal for depression and it is a normal response for whatever is causing your difficulties and that’s why talking to a mental health professional is critical. Here are some questions at the end of this podcast episode: ·       Have you ever encountered leaden paralysis before? Either through personal or clinical experience. ·       How have you dealt with these experiences of leaden paralysis? ·       Do you know how to practise self-kindness? ·       How could you learn more about self-kindness? ·       What would you say to a loved one and/ or client who struggles to get out of bed in the morning because of their depression?   If you want to learn more, please check out: FREE 8 PSYCHOLOGY BOOK BOXSET CBT For Depression: A Clinical Psychology Introduction To Cognitive Behavioural Therapy For Depression . Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Patreon for exclusive access and rewards Have a great day. Clinical Psychology References and Further Reading Alshehri, T., Mook-Kanamori, D. O., de Mutsert, R., Penninx, B. W., Rosendaal, F. R., le Cessie, S., & Milaneschi, Y. (2023). The association between adiposity and atypical energy-related symptoms of depression: a role for metabolic dysregulations. Brain, Behavior, and Immunity, 108, 197-203. Chae, W. R., Baumert, J., Nübel, J., Brasanac, J., Gold, S. M., Hapke, U., & Otte, C. (2023). Associations between individual depressive symptoms and immunometabolic characteristics in major depression. European Neuropsychopharmacology, 71, 25-40. Collins, K. A., Eng, G. K., Tural, Ü., Irvin, M. K., Iosifescu, D. V., & Stern, E. R. (2022). Affective and somatic symptom clusters in depression and their relationship to treatment outcomes in the STAR* D sample. Journal of Affective Disorders, 300, 469-473. Friedrich, M. J. (2017). Depression is the leading cause of disability around the world. Jama, 317(15), 1517-1517. Guo, Z. P., Chen, L., Tang, L. R., Gao, Y., Qu, M., Wang, L., & Liu, C. H. (2025). The differential orbitofrontal activity and connectivity between atypical and typical major depressive disorder. NeuroImage: Clinical, 45, 103717. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/beyond-mental-health/202407/when-it-feels-impossible-to-get-out-of-bed Qi, B., MacDonald, K., Berlim, M. T., Fielding, A., Lis, E., Low, N., ... & Trakadis, Y. (2020). Balance problems, paralysis, and angina as clinical markers for severity in major depression. Frontiers in psychiatry, 11, 567394. Vreijling, S. R., Fatt, C. R. C., Williams, L. M., Schatzberg, A. F., Usherwood, T., Nemeroff, C. B., ... & Lamers, F. (2024). Features of immunometabolic depression as predictors of antidepressant treatment outcomes: pooled analysis of four clinical trials.  The British Journal of Psychiatry ,  224 (3), 89-97. I truly hope that you’ve enjoyed this blog post and if you feel like supporting the blog on an ongoing basis and get lots of rewards, then please head to my Patreon  page. However, if want to show one-time support and appreciation, the place to do that is PayPal. If you do that, please include your email address in the notes section, so I can say thank you. Which I am going to say right now. Thank you! Click  https://www.buymeacoffee.com/connorwhiteley  for a one-time bit of support.

Whilst statistics might be a psychological topic that lots of aspiring and qualified psychologists dread, learning about psychometrics and psychological measurements is a lot of fun and it is really interesting. We need to understand how to create good psychometric measurements so we can measure the behaviour we intend to and not any other variables. This is even more important for aspiring and qualified clinical psychologists where the quality and accuracy of our psychometric measurements could be the difference between people receiving or being denied mental health support. This statistics topic is critical to understand and appreciate. Therefore, in this psychological statistics podcast episode, you’ll learn what are psychometrics, what are psychological measurements and a lot more insightful facts that will deepen your understanding of statistics. Today’s psychology podcast episode has been sponsored by 401 Statistics Questions For Psychology Students: A Guide To Psychology Statistics, Research Methods and More . Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Psychometrics and Psychological Measurements COPYRIGHT 2025 Connor Whiteley. Extract from 401 Statistics Questions For Psychology Students: A Guide To Psychology Statistics, Research Methods and More . I think this is a great chapter to kick-off the deep-dive sections of the book because psychometrics and psychological measurements, are essentially the lifeblood of psychology as a science. Due to if we didn’t use psychometrics and if we didn’t have valid, reliable measures then psychology wouldn’t be a science and that would be awful. Then again, this is an issue that no one normally thinks about, because I never think about psychometrics and measurements. And that’s slightly concerning because in clinical psychology we want to measure and track someone’s mental health condition with accuracy and reliability. I’m hardly alone. I don’t think I know too many applied or even theoretical psychologists who focus on psychometrics and psychological measurements. Leading us to use the same tools and scales over and over again without anyone truly focusing on how good they actually are. This is the focus and aim of the various topics that we’re going to be looking at in this book. What Is A Measurement In Psychology? In statistics, a measurement is the assignment of numbers to a quantifiable attribute according to a rule. Also, this rule can be arbitrary so this allows for multiple assignments. For example, temperature can be measured in Fahrenheit or Celsius, which are two different scales/ assignments. As well as these two scales can be turned into each other because they have a linear transformation. Equally, this assignment can be non-linear because the Richter scale is a way to measure earthquakes. Each number means the earthquake is 10 times more powerful than the previous number. Therefore, if an earthquake has a value of 10 on the Richter scale then it is 10 times more powerful than an earthquake that has a value of 9. What Is Scaling In Psychology? In statistics, scaling is the process of setting up the rule of correspondence between observations and numbers assigned. As well as McDonald (1999) added that data and observations are very different, because data are scaled observations. What Are Noisy Measurements? According to Henk Kelderman noisy measurements are outcomes that are considered indicators of a given attribute but these indicators cannot be directly observed. What Are Some Examples of Noisy Observations? Noisy observations can include non-response, recall, subjectivity, response styles and self-deception as well as motivated misresponse. What Are Psychometrics? In psychology statistics, psychometrics focuses on the development of formal methods and theories that help us to study the fidelity and appropriateness of different psychological measurements. In addition, Dr Henk Kelderman writes at http://www.psychometrika.org/society/index.html ): “Measurement and quantification is ubiquitous in modern society. In early modernity, the scientific revolution provided a firm scientific basis for physical measures like temperature, pressure, and so on. In the late nineteenth and early twentieth century, a similar revolution took place in psychology with the measurement of intelligence and personality. A crucial role was played by Psychometrics, initially defined as "The art of imposing measurement and number upon operations of the mind.” Since 1936 the Psychometric Society has been at the forefront of the development of formal theories and methods to study the appropriateness and fidelity of psychological measurements. Because measurement in psychology is often done with tests and questionnaires, it is rather imprecise and subject to error. Consequently, statistics plays a major role in psychometrics. For example, members of the society have devoted much attention to the development of statistical methods for the appraisal of noisy measurements whose outcomes are considered indicators of attributes of interest that cannot be directly observed. Today, psychometrics covers virtually all statistical methods that are useful for the behavioral and social sciences including the handling of missing data, the combination of prior information with measured data, measurement obtained from special experiments, visualization of statistical outcomes, measurement that guarantees personal privacy, and so on. Psychometric models and methods now have a wide range of applicability in various disciplines such as education, industrial and organizational psychology, behavioral genetics, neuropsychology, clinical psychology, medicine, and even chemistry.” What Are Some Ways To Collect Observations In Psychology? To gather observations you could collect reaction times, self-reports, peer ratings, time to relapse, time in remission, basal level of skin conductance and many, many more. What Is Theory of Data? According to Coombs (1960), his Theory of Data classifies the essential focus of every psychological measurement we use in the discipline is to associate each construct of interest, stimulus or individual to a point in a psychological space. Also, he mentioned in his 1960 paper that “basically, all a person can do is to compare stimuli with each other, or against some absolute standard or personal reference point.” How Many Categories Are Optimal For Likert Scaling? Whilst it is technically true that more categories mean more data points, in reality, 5 categories are optimal in Likert Scaling. Since research shows participants cannot meaningfully differentiate between more than 7 categories. What Is Another Name For Optimal Scaling? Correspondence analysis is another name for optimal scaling. What Is Optimal Scaling? This type of scaling derives its values for response options that are statistically optimal. For example, Optimal Scaling seeks to maximise the internal consistency of a scale (also known as the correlations between the stimuli measuring the same thing). How Are Test Scores Assigned? A test score in statistics is assigned using one of the scaling methods. As well as test score is the weighted sum of the item scores or it is the sum of the items scores. The weight of each item score is determined before scoring as well as optimal scaling and judgemental scaling assign their weights to basic responses. What Is A Criterion-Referenced Measurement? This is a measurement that is referenced by a pre-defined standard of behaviour (this is the criterion). Since the criterion is the area of a subject that the test is designed to measure. For example, a criterion for a diagnosis of social anxiety disorder might be a client must endorse 80% of items on a questionnaire. This is a criterion-referenced measurement because you don’t need to compare this client to anyone else, you only been to reference their scores to criterion. What Is A Norm-Referenced Measurement? This is when a measurement is based on the distribution of scores obtained from the population that the researchers interested in. This is basically the “norm” that everyone is compared against. What Is Thurstone’s Law of Comparative Judgement? His Law of Comparative Judgement from 1927 proposes that each stimulus must elicit a psychological value from a participant. As well as the respondents should choose the stimulus with the highest psychological value at the moment of comparison with these values being distributed normally in the population. What Is An Example of Measurement By Fiat? Likert scaling is an example of measurement by Fiat because researchers have arbitrarily decided how to assign numbers to a response so this assignment lacks any empirical justification. What Are Some Examples of Measurement of Modelling? Since measurement by modelling involves scores that are based on models for stimulus respondent behaviour, Guttman and Thurstonian scaling are good examples. What Is Type 1 Data In Psychology Statistics? Type 1 data or Type 1 Observations are preferential choices where the participant is asked which of the two stimuli they prefer. What is Type 2 Data? Type 2 data is Single Stimulus where participants are asked where they stand in relation to the stimulus. What is Type 3 Data? Type 3 Data is stimulus comparison where participants are asked which of the two stimuli have more of some attributes. What Is Type 4 Data? Type 4 Data is Similarities where participants are asked which of the two pairs of stimuli are more alike. What Type of Data Is Used In Multidimensional Scaling? Similarities (Type 4 Data) is used in Multidimensional scaling. What Type Of Data Does Thurstonian Scaling Use? Thurstonian Scaling works for both Type 1 Data (preferential choice) and stimulus comparison (Type 3 Data). What Is Thurstonian Scaling? In 1927, Thurstone proposed a way to estimate population means of stimuli from their rank orderings in a sample drawn from the population of interest. Therefore, all means can be estimated in relation to the mean of some “referent” stimulus if we follow some basic rules of comparative judgements which he called Thurstone’s Law of Comparative Judgements.   If you want to learn more, please check out: FREE 8 PSYCHOLOGY BOOK BOXSET 401 Statistics Questions For Psychology Students: A Guide To Psychology Statistics, Research Methods and More.  Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Patreon for exclusive access and rewards Have a great day. Statistical Psychology Reference Whiteley, C. (2025) 401 Statistics Questions For Psychology Students: A Guide To Psychology Statistics, Research Methods and More. CGD Publishing. England. I truly hope that you’ve enjoyed this blog post and if you feel like supporting the blog on an ongoing basis and get lots of rewards, then please head to my Patreon  page. However, if want to show one-time support and appreciation, the place to do that is PayPal. If you do that, please include your email address in the notes section, so I can say thank you. Which I am going to say right now. Thank you! Click  https://www.buymeacoffee.com/connorwhiteley  for a one-time bit of support.

Recently through my university, I received a job advert for an Assistant Educational Psychologist position starting in September with the only experience requirement being that you have worked at least one year full-time with children. This was perfect for me because I’ve been working with children and young people part-time for six years, so I will definitely be applying to this position next week. However, my understanding of educational psychology is very surface level, so in case I become an educational psychologist, it would be very useful to have a greater understanding of educational psychology. Therefore, in this careers in psychology podcast episode, you’ll learn what is educational psychology, what do educational psychologists do, what are the potential careers within educational psychology and more. If you enjoy learning about psychology careers, applied psychology and the psychology of learning then this will be a great episode for you. Today’s psychology podcast episode has been sponsored by Retrieval-Based Learning . Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. What Is Educational Psychology? Educational psychology is the empirical study of how we learn and retain information. This area of psychology mainly focuses on the learning processes in early childhood as well as adolescence, but as learning is lifelong, it can focus on adults too. Also, it’s important to bear in mind that even though educational psychology sounds like it only focuses on education settings, learning takes place through life experiences like the home, family, friends, work, culture and through social media. Therefore, educational psychology investigates how learning can occur in all these different situations. Furthermore, when it comes to educational psychologists, these psychologists study the biological, cognitive, social and emotional factors that underpin learning as well as deepen our understanding of individual learning styles, the importance of learning environments and instructional strategies. The entire point of educational psychology is to help people learn in the best way possible. Educational psychologists can specialise in children with specific learning difficulties or neurodevelopmental conditions. As well as educational psychologists can develop teaching methods to help students reach their full potential in schools. I know the Assistant Educational Psychologist position that I’m going to apply for focuses on working with children with autism and specific learning difficulties. Whereas, a woman I used to know she did work experience in an educational psychology role helping to do assessments for children with special educational needs and she loved it. What Topics Can Educational Psychologists Study? If you want to become an educational psychologist, there are a lot of different topics and areas you could work in and study. For example, you could work in organisational learning where you study how people learn in organisational settings like the workplace. I think this sounds great to some extent because if you have a burning passion for business psychology but you’re interested in learning too then this is a great way to combine both topics. Also, this just goes to show how psychology can constantly be combined and applied in so many unexpected ways. I never would have thought to combine learning and the workplace. Another topic you could study as an educational psychologist is educational technology by looking at how different types of technology can help students learn. I would add that you could see what types of technology improves people’s ability to learn the best. I imagine that for some people artificial intelligence could be useful but other learners might find virtual reality more useful. It is a random idea but those are the sort of fun experiments and research questions you could investigate in educational psychology. In addition, educational psychologists can work in instructional design so they research how to effectively design learning materials for different students based on their learning style, their age, their cognitive development and whether or not they have any special educational needs. Personally, a small part of me would not mind working in this area. It definitely wouldn’t be my “forever” job, but I think it would be interesting to see how this works in more depth. Also, I do have experience in this area because as part of being a Postgraduate Ambassador for my university, I’ve already developed age-appropriate materials for students at different ages and that is a lot of fun. The final three options, that we’ll look at in this podcast episode (but there are more available in the real world) are educational psychologists could be involved in curriculum development by creating coursework that maximises a person’s ability to learn. As well as they can work with gifted learners so educational psychologists can support learners who are identified as gifted. Lastly, psychologists can work with children and young people with special educational needs by providing them with specialised instructions. This is something I’ve seen a few times in the real world. Especially, during my work experience with an NHS learning disability team because I went to a college that had a centre for people with special educational needs. And it was useful to see how staff spoke, broke down tasks and interacted with each student. It’s hard to explain briefly in a paragraph but it was useful to see how instructions needed to be adapted so the student could effectively understand what was being asked of them. What Psychological Perspectives Does Educational Psychology Draw On? Like most of psychology, educational psychology draws on a lot of psychological theories, research and practices from other areas of psychology. For example, educational psychology draws on theories and research from behavioural psychology, developmental psychology, cognitive psychology and more. At the time of writing, within educational psychology, there are five main schools of thought, which we’ll look at in more depth in a moment. These are cognitivism, behaviourism, constructivism, social contextual learning theories and experientialism. It's important to be aware of each of these main perspectives because each one has their own focus on specific factors that influence a person’s learning ability. Whether this is through influences on experiences, behaviours, emotions, thoughts and more. What Is The Cognitive Perspective In Educational Psychology? The cognitive perspective has become one of the most widespread theories in educational psychology because it accounts for a wide range of different factors that impact learning. For example, the cognitive perspective accounts for the effects of thinking, memory formation, information processing and more unlike the other perspectives. Therefore, in learning and cognitive psychology, this perspective focuses on how constructs, like emotions, motivations, individual perspectives and beliefs impact the learning process. Then this cognitive theory is supported by the idea that a person learns because of their own intrinsic motivation that has nothing to do with external rewards as a behaviourist would see learning. More on that in a moment. As a result, educational psychologists use the cognitive perspective to understand what motivates children and young people to learn, how they problem solve, how children remember what they’ve learnt amongst other topics. What is The Behaviourist Perspective In Educational Psychology? Our second perspective proposes that all of our behaviours are learnt through conditioning, like negative reinforcement. Behavioural psychologists who believe in the behaviourist perspective firmly rely on the principles of operant conditioning to explain how learning happens. In essence, behaviourism suggests that teachers reward students with tokens or another desirable outcome or stimulus and this motivates the students to learn. Also, if the teacher punishes a student for doing bad behaviour then the student learns not to do that in the future. Within educational psychology, behaviourism is understood to be somewhat useful with the idea of rewarding students teaches them good behaviour. Yet behaviourism has thankfully been heavily criticised for not acknowledging or taking into account for the internal psychological motivations of a child or young person. Like, intrinsic motivation, emotions as well as attitudes. Personally, I’m a good example of why the behaviourist approach isn’t completely right, because I love learning about psychology, I love podcasting and learning everything I possibly can. Not because a teacher is rewarding me for learning about psychology, but because this brings me joy, it is my passion and I would hate not to learn about psychology and other topics. What is The Developmental Perspective In Educational Psychology? Just like Developmental Psychology , the developmental perspective investigates how our biology, cognitive, social and emotional development impacts our learning throughout the lifespan. Therefore, in an educational psychology context, this helps us to understand how children and young people learn new knowledge and skills as they grow up and develop. Personally, as much as I flat out hate the “nature versus nurture” debate because research clearly shows most behaviours are a mixture of the two with one type of factor being the dominant influence and the other being a smaller factor but still influencing the behaviour. When it comes to educational psychology, there is still a focus on the impact of nature versus nurture on the learning process. For instance, as the brain develops so does a child’s capacity to learn, remember and problem solve. These are the biological factors. Yet at the same time, there are nurture and environmental factors impacting the child’s ability to learn too from their life experiences with peers, teachers, parents, family and other important people in their life. A good theory to look at here is Jean Piaget’s stages of cognitive development model that explains how children grow intellectually throughout childhood. You can read more about this theory and more in Developmental Psychology: A Guide To Developmental and Child Psychology.   On the whole, educational psychologists use the developmental perspective to understand how children think at different stages of their development so they can better understand what children are capable of learning at each developmental stage. In turn, this helps educators to create instructional materials and methods that are appropriate for each age group. What Is The Experiential Perspective In Educational Psychology? The experiential perspective focuses on how a person’s life experiences impact how they learn and understand new information. In addition, this perspective considers emotions, feelings and experiences similar to the cognitive and constructivist perspectives too. Then this perspective helps educational psychologists to understand how learners find personal meaning in their education instead of feeling that the information doesn’t apply to them. In case you don’t think this is important to understand because you believe children and young people think everything that they learn is important to them. Just think about your maths lessons as a child, how many times did you sit in algebra wondering when you were going to use it? It was only last night I was having a conversation with a friend about how useless algebra was, and she disagreed with me. And I don’t really remember much about algebra because I didn’t think it applied to me. As educators, this reaction from students is the last thing that we want. This was something I learnt during my pedagogical training through my university for my postgraduate ambassador job. Due to one of the 4 pedagogical outcomes is “value of learning” so it’s important to show students that what they're learning is relevant and important to them as well as they can use it in the real world. This helps to improve engagement and it shows them they should focus and remember what they learnt today. In my psychology content for my university, I’ve included short sections at the end and throughout my content that remind students why this is important and why they should value what they’re learning today. What is The Constructivist Perspective In Educational Psychology? The constructivist approach is definitely an area of psychology I need to learn more about because I flat out love how this approach accounts for the role of social and cultural influences on our behaviour. In this case, our learning behaviour. As a result, someone who believes in the constructivist approach proposes that what a person already knows significantly influences how they will learn new information. In other words, new knowledge can only be added to and understood in terms of existing knowledge with this perspective relying heavily on the work of Lev Vygotsky with his ideas on the zone of proximal development as well as instructional scaffolding. In my opinion, I largely agree with this theory because last week is a good example of this. Since I live and breathe clinical psychology through my lectures, my books and my podcast, I can largely walk into any psychology lecture and understand and learn a lot of information. I make links between what I currently know and the new information that I am learning in the lecture. Whereas last week, I went to my housemates’ second year atomic physics lecture and I did not understand any of it whatsoever. It was talking about the periodic table but that was all I understood because I didn’t have any past information besides what I learnt at GCSE (when I was 16 years old). I couldn’t learn or remember any of this atomic physics information because I had no preexisting knowledge. What Are Educational Psychology Careers? If you like the sound of educational psychology then there are a lot of potential career options for you. For example, the majority of educational psychologists work directly in schools because some psychologists are teachers but other educational psychologists help teachers try new learning methods as well as develop new course content. Another career option as an educational psychologist is to work in academic research where you conduct research on different topics within learning. Or you could work in administration where you can influence education methods and help students learn in the best possible way for them. A final career option within education psychology is to become a counsellor where you directly help students cope with any barriers to the learning that they face. Lastly, for this section, to be able to become an educational psychologist you need to have a Bachelor’s and Master’s degree as well as if you want to work in school administration or at a university then you might need a doctorate. If you’re a UK listener then at the time of writing, the Doctorate of Educational Psychology is fully funded. Careers In Psychology Conclusion Personally, because I do a lot of work in schools through my university’s Outreach department as a student ambassador, I often think about working in school directly as a psychologist. This is one of the reasons why I’m interested in applying for the Assistant Educational Psychologist position because it’s interesting, it will allow me to work in education (a place where I feel really comfortable) and it means I can continue to work with children. Which is interesting because when I was younger and even a few years ago, I never would have said I wanted to work with children and young people. Yet now, I almost couldn’t imagine not working with children, because students have been a big and very positive part of my life for the past six years. Ultimately, I would love to work directly in schools as an educational psychologist with a clinical focus. Since before this podcast episode, the only real information I had about educational psychology was that there were two types. A clinical educational psychologist and a research educational psychologist. To wrap up today’s episode, educational psychology offers us a lot of exciting opportunities to understand how people learn and the different factors that play an important role in informing teaching methods as well as educational strategies. Due to educational psychology explores the learning processing through examining different areas of learning behaviour like how developmental, cognitive, social, emotional amongst other factors impact learning. Then this can all be applied to different areas of education like educational technology, special education, curriculum design and more. If you want to work with children and young people, make a difference and contribute to education as a whole then becoming an educational psychologist could be perfect for you. Therefore, here are some questions to think at the end of this episode: ·       Does educational psychology interest you? ·       Would you want to work in education and make a difference? ·       What area of educational psychology excites you? ·       Is there anything holding you back from exploring educational psychology in more depth?   If you want to learn more, please check out: FREE 8 PSYCHOLOGY BOOK BOXSET Retrieval-Based Learning . Available from all major eBook retailers and you can order the paperback and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore and local library, if you request it. Also available as an AI-narrated audiobook from selected audiobook platforms and library systems. For example, Kobo, Spotify, Barnes and Noble, Google Play, Overdrive, Baker and Taylor and Bibliotheca. Patreon for exclusive access and rewards Have a great day. Careers In Psychology Psychology References and Further Reading Borich, G. D., & Tombari, M. L. (2021). Educational psychology: A contemporary approach. Černý, M. (2023). Educational psychology aspects of learning with chatbots without artificial intelligence: Suggestions for designers. European journal of investigation in health, psychology and education, 13(2), 284-305. Gillham, B. (Ed.). (2022). Reconstructing educational psychology. Routledge. Hornstra, L., Mathijssen, A. S., Denissen, J. J., & Bakx, A. (2023). Academic motivation of intellectually gifted students and their classmates in regular primary school classes: A multidimensional, longitudinal, person-and variable-centered approach. Learning and Individual Differences, 107, 102345. https://www.apa.org/education-career/guide/careers Locke, J., & John, J. A. S. (2024). Some thoughts on education. BoD–Books on Demand. MacLeod, A., Burm, S., & Mann, K. (2022). Constructivism: learning theories and approaches to research. Researching medical education, 25-40. Molina Roldán, S., Marauri, J., Aubert, A., & Flecha, R. (2021). How inclusive interactive learning environments benefit students without special needs. Frontiers in psychology, 12, 661427. Roediger, H. L. (2013). Applying Cognitive Psychology to Education: Translational Educational Science. Psychological Science in the Public Interest, 14(1), 1-3. https://doi.org/10.1177/1529100612454415 (Original work published 2013) Sepp, S., Wong, M., Hoogerheide, V., & Castro‐Alonso, J. C. (2022). Shifting online: 12 tips for online teaching derived from contemporary educational psychology research. Journal of Computer Assisted Learning, 38(5), 1304-1320. Siann, G., & Ugwuegbu, D. C. (2024). Educational psychology in a changing world. Taylor & Francis. Woolfolk, A. (2016). Educational psychology. Pearson. I truly hope that you’ve enjoyed this blog post and if you feel like supporting the blog on an ongoing basis and get lots of rewards, then please head to my Patreon  page. However, if want to show one-time support and appreciation, the place to do that is PayPal. If you do that, please include your email address in the notes section, so I can say thank you. Which I am going to say right now. Thank you! Click  https://www.buymeacoffee.com/connorwhiteley  for a one-time bit of support.