3 Beliefs That Can Harm Relationships: A Cognitive Psychology and Social Psychology Podcast Episode


cognitive psychology and social psychology podcast episode

There are lots of terrible relationship myths and beliefs that can harm or even destroy relationships. So welcome to this cognitive and social psychology podcast episode where we tackle three of these myths.


This episode has been sponsored by Psychology of Relationships: The Social Psychology of Friendships, Romantic Relationships, Prosocial Behaviour and More. Available on all major eBook retailer, and you can order the paperback, large print and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore local library if you request it from them.


Also a shout out to my Forensic Psychology Collection that launched today as well. Available in all the usual places.


3 Beliefs that Can Harm Relationships

Distance Destroys Relationships

This is a great first belief to look at because we’ve all heard this at one point of another that long distance relationships do not work. They will always fail and people will always get hurt.


However, this isn’t necessarily true because physical distance away from your partner can actually make you closer. Since you have to communicate more often and you have to improve your communication styles. As well as when you’re together you need to maximise your time together and make every second count. By doing fun things and activities. (Jiang & Hancock, 2013).


In fact the interesting finding is that when a US survey was done using a sample of 1000 people in long distance relationships. The researcher found these relationships experienced more dedication, less hostility, more love, more fun amongst other positive findings.


Overall, possibly showing that people shouldn’t be afraid of long distance relationship because it could make them closer.


Mismatched Sex Drives:

The common thinking is, is that if a frisky person ends up dating a less sexual person, then this will end in disaster, and it would never work.


At first, I completely agree, because just how would it work?


However, research from 2020 found that mismatched sex drives didn’t matter and it didn’t spell disaster for the relationship. Or these mismatched sex drives weren’t as problematic as people first believed.


What did matter was the overall couples’ desire because people who had higher levels of sexual desire between them had higher levels of sexual satisfaction. Regardless of whether or not they were on the same page.


That was probably my most PG rated section on the podcast so far!


Positivity Always Saves Relationships

This is another great logical point because we would have thought that if people in relationship stay positive then the relationship will improve. Of course that sounds logical and perfect.


However, positive thinking only goes so far in the real world. As well as terms of relationship, positive thinking only helps with the occasional small problems.


When it comes to big problems in the relationship, this positive thinking and setting positive expectations can lead to a decrease in relationship satisfaction.


Also focusing on the positive can deter the people in the relationship from dealing with the underlying issues so these problems never get better.


Most probably leading to relationship breakdown in the future.


Overall, I really hope you’ve enjoyed this psychology podcast episode.


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Psychology of Relationships: The Social Psychology of Friendships, Romantic Relationships, Prosocial Behaviour and More. Available on all major eBook retailer, and you can order the paperback, large print and hardback copies from Amazon, your local bookstore local library if you request it from them.


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Social Psychology and Cognitive Psychology References:

Jiang, L.C., & Hancock, J. T. (2013). Absence makes the communication grow fonder: geographic separation, interpersonal media, and intimacy in dating relationships. Journal of Communication, 63, 556–577.


Kelmer, G., Rhoades, G. K., Stanley, S., & Markman, H. J. (2013). Relationship quality, commitment, and stability in long‐distance relationships. Family Process, 52(2), 257-270.


Kim, J. J., Muise, A., Barranti, M., Mark, K. P., Rosen, N. O., Harasymchuk, C., & Impett, E. (2020). Are couples more satisfied when they match in sexual desire?: New insights from response surface analyses. Social Psychological and Personality Science. https://doi.org/10.1177/1948550620926770

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